#2572 - Colum Tyrrell

Joe Rogan podcast check it out The Joe Rogan experience train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night all day.

What's the story? Good to see you, brother. What's happening? I'm great, man, Thanks for doing this, man.

thanks for having me.

My pleasure. I'm excited to talk to you.

Yeah, so I I. I was so nervous about my special these last couple of weeks that I don't even think I was really even thinking about this at all. So it probably kind of worked as a nice distraction. Cause if I didn't have anything else going on, this would have just been over my head all the time.

Oh yeah, I know it fucks people up the first time they do it. After you do it a couple times, you're like, Ah, it's just we're just hanging out. But in the beginning, but this is it's, it's, it's a mind fuck.

this is a global scale for me. It's This is,

me too. I try not to think about it.

yeah, cause all I'm thinking now is like, we'll say something about fucking

Oh, 100%.

Sydney Sweeney's tits, and then I gotta get a phone call off my mother, like, What?

Did you see how those women that they interviewed these women? And they, uh, asked them what was, uh, a worse impact on women in society, whether it was Lindy Clancy or Sydney Sweeney, what was worse for women? And they almost like, I mean, I don't know where they went. Obviously it's a biased sampling group, but all these women were saying Sydney Sweeney Yeah, really, Yeah,

they they just wanna clock each, they wanna just peck each other to death. Yeah, that's what it is, yeah, cause she really made it out of the swamp, she made it out of the swamp. She's like, as famous as you could possibly be, just mostly because of her tits, really, which, uh, you know what I'm actually, you know what

saying?

I thought? I always thought she was a good actor. And um,

She is good.

a couple of the things, uh, euphoria and stuff, yeah, uh-huh. She's yeah,

just too hot, they don't like it

yeah. But she's also kinda not like crazy, strikingly beautiful, so just something that makes her even more popular, really. you know? I You think, so, think I don't think she's like a catwalk model. She's not like a Victoria's Secret model. She her face is a little let's well, honestly, I know this is horrible, but I'm not even getting rude.

I'm gonna defend her. I think she's hot as a sun. So I just don't know do so if I'm

do I.

a short. So I think Oh, listen, I think she's, I she's five, she's, think she's I think as attractive as the sun, she's attractive

the the short thing matters with men, but does it really matter with women? Like, for models, whether or not you think they're, oh, for models,

Yeah, cause I was just here for model, that's all.

right? But as to whether or not she's attractive, she's fucking beautiful, man.

I would. I would disagree with the, uh, previous statements. So listen. Yeah, I know I'm not saying what you're talking about, I'm I'm dog.

I'm not saying I'm a beautiful man by any means, but so don't get this twisted. Well, I'm definitely But

not either. yeah, so But

once we said that, now let's rip her to shreds, let's go.

she's pretty fucking hot, dude.

She, she really is. I mean, Yeah, yeah,

I don't know how you could say that's not a ten. That girl right there is hot as the fucking sun, you are right. Yeah, she's hot.

alright, I changed my mind.

It's ladies don't like it, they just don't like when woman a woman has that kind of power. Cause they know that too much of being a woman, at least in America, at least in 2026. I'm sorry, but too much of it resides on whether or not you are attractive to the opposite sex. When women walk into a room, they like to be the most attractive person in the room, and you fucking know if you walk into a room and that bitch walks in, I know everyone's gonna look at her.

she's, yeah, she is the typical bombshell blonde, big tits Big and all the guys see her. We all go, naturals, oh, look at big real ones, her. Yeah,

that's the thing.

also, it must be weird for her to to be in a world where just people are, I guess, so obsessed with her looks. Kinda, you know,

Well, I mean, she's putting it out there, right? She's doing that sports yeah, she's, ad commercial with she has her, footballs over her tits.

she has her own like gambling Good, app now and stuff like that.

well, I think she's probably working with one boy. If there's anything, this is like the most controversial thing in I. One of the most po controversial things today is gambling ads, and whether or not gambling should be legal. Peop. Some people are, like, fully against gambling being legal, and I'm like, Boy, I don't understand It the that.

I, I grew up with gam, uh, gambling's legal in Ireland, it always was, but then we had a like a a bookies, which was like attached to the pub. Nearly everywhere you go. So you'd have to physically go in there and write out a slip and you could bet on the horses and stuff like that. And it seemed to be relatively managed well. But I think, first of all, the phones are a disaster and then you add gambling to the phones.

I've heard a lot of stories of people like throwing shit away just because the phones are addictive no matter what. And then they Pl. You'd be putting a bet on basketball and it'll go bling. You just won a free, uh, blackjack, why don't you play blackjack? And then you'll be there for an hour and you've lost $500.

right, or don't do that, that's the thing. It's like, uh, shouldn't you be able to have a balanced life and also bet 500 bucks on a game that you care about? If you're a regular person with a regular job and you're not insane and you go, Oh shit, the Knicks are playing tonight, I think they're gonna fucking take it. Let's go. And you throw 500 dollar bet on it and it makes it exciting for you.

You got something riding on it. Come on, fuck yeah, woo. People like that. I don't know why we're supposed to take that away because some people can't control it. And you look, I've this said this many times, I've talked about this. T I I. From the time I was twenty three till I was like twenty five, I lived in a pool hall. Like, uh, I lived playing pool and hanging out with gamblers. I, I know gambling

the hustler.

addicts, yeah, I I know, like, legitimate gambling addicts. They're they're they gamble, they'll gamble on raindrops coming down a window.

Yeah, well, no, you can poly market, you'll pull it out.

And I understand why some people would have a problem with it, but don't do it if you have a problem with it. That's what I don't understand, like, what? When we're we're micro-managing every single aspect of society and turning it into a nanny state. I feel like you should be able to drink. I I mean, look, I think you should be able to do drugs, and I think they should be legal, and I think we should be able to sell real drugs.

So you shouldn't have to worry about getting fentanyl

You think you could get overdoses. coke at seven eleven?

Not at seven eleven, maybe at a liquor store.

yeah, but then that. But now that's the same argument. But I go well, why can't I? Cause I can control my coke, I should be allowed to buy it at seven eleven.

Yeah, okay, well, you can get booze at seven eleven, so fair point you. C. I mean, what is the can you get, like, hard liquor at by the way, seven eleven?

you can get coke outside of seven eleven, every single seven They could also eleven.

die. You could take a Yeah, but fucking ecstasy that's kinda part pill. That of the fun as it of drugs is today,

is gone.

today, it is the part of the gamble.

When people go, is that safe? You go, Probably could be, you let me know.

she did it an hour ago and she's right there,

Yeah, that's the the canary.

she's dancing like seems okay. Yeah, it's, uh, it's fucking weird. What were you gonna say, James?

it just. It depends on the state. State liquor laws are different everywhere, like in California, I think you could buy them in the grocery store. And

You buy like Jack Daniels, Wow,

I get you, yeah, but

well, Jack Daniels in the grocery store makes sense, but does it make sense in seven eleven?

but then there's different, like the gas. Some gas stations would have like liquor stores attached to them, and some wouldn't, and then like, it just depends Yeah, it's weird, on.

cause I I live in New Jersey, so I we can't buy certain booze at, uh, grocery stores, so you have to go. But like, it doesn't really make sense, cause you can buy some things here, some things there.

Well, I lived in Massachusetts when I was a kid, and we would have to go to New Hampshire for booze on Sunday. Because

Go, yeah, there you go, Massachusetts had yeah, booze laws, they yeah,

had, uh, what is it? Blue laws? Is that what it's called? There's laws on Sunday where you weren't allowed to buy booze. That was the Lord's day, you son of a bitch,

And you'd get a bunch

go to church, you piece of shit.

bunch of boys in a car, we'd drive up to New Hampshire, and, uh, they crack em open on the way back.

would. They would call them package stores, so we would call it the packy. We're going to the packy. And guys would take Very a fucking

different meaning in Ireland.

hour and a half. What does it mean up there? Oh, Pakistani,

Yeah, it's a bit of a slur for Br- Browns.

No. For us, it was package store. I don't know how it became package store, but you'd have to go to New Hampshire.

and you guys wouldn't just like buy a lot on Saturday, you'd No, we're retarded, fucking you, you, you did, eighteen years old, but you drank it all. we don't know Yeah,

what the fuck we're doing. Yeah, for sure, there was some guy who was twenty one, he was driving. But yeah, you'd have fearing to go all the

for your legs.

way. And there was no gambling. You would have to go to back then, you'd have to go to Vegas to gamble, or you'd have to find a bookie, an actual bookie, you know, an illegal bookie that was connected to the mob. That was the only way. Because you, uh,

But then you have to, you really have to work for your gambling. That's what you know. It's. And then I think you would probably think about your bets a little

would you? better. I don't, I doubt I, I don't know, it, I doubt it.

I've not, I've not met a mob boss and made a bet yet.

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Or go to Lifelock dot com. Slash JRE for 30% off. Terms apply. I feel like people that are off the rails are just gonna be off the rails. I feel like we. What we really need is to teach people when they're very young how to control impulses and the value of discipline. And that you can control your behavior and you can control your urges in terms of, like, gambling, alcohol. Like, there are people that are absolutely genetically addicted to alcohol and genetically addicted to other things.

I'm not. But them aside, with a lot of people, it's a self-control issue. It's whether or not you choose to do a positive thing or choose to do a negative thing. And the thing is about gambling is, I don't think it's always a negative thing, and I think for some people, it's fun and they like it. It makes it a little extra exciting. And they're not ruining their life, so should they not

I know.

be able to do it for people who do ruin their life?

yeah, I don't know. I always would place bets on, like the Super Bowl, big games like that. Add a little something, I'd do the boxes at the bars, you know, Fun add a little yeah, yeah,

something. I like it.

yeah. But now it's kinda seems like it's it a lotta. Just college kids are kinda just fucking. They're growing up where that's normalized to have like a certain amount of your money lost to gambling. And I guess we need to teach them not to be doing that.

Do we? What remains today? The main surviving Texas blue law restrictions concern alcohol sales and motor vehicle sales. Liquor stores close on Sundays, and car dealers cannot sell vehicles on both Saturday and Sunday of the same weekend. What

Why? That's why I brought it up.

Saturday and Sunday of the same weekend?

So those are the only ones that last. There was a I was got into this because there was a long list of forty two very specific items that weren't allowed to be sold. And it was repealed in like the sixties or eighties or something.

This is for Texas.

This was for Texas, I don't know about for every other state. It's just it's also a very strange list of stuff.

So what are the categories Electronics. removed? These are things that you couldn't sell,

Yeah, you couldn't.

you couldn't sell electronics on Sunday.

It was repealed in 1985.

How weird is that? Electronics? That's the devil's work. Clothing, furniture, kitchen utensils, Footwear. Can't buy shoes appliances. on Sunday.

So you couldn't go shopping basically, or you couldn't buy. I mean, you could go shopping, this is, these you just couldn't buy are all, anything.

these are all Texas laws. Jesus, LOL son, Yeah, you gotta.

Jesus wants you to not sell guitars on a Sunday.

there was a medic, uh, put put that back up. That list, it's crazy. Musical instruments, recordings and toys. If your kid wants a fucking toy, Sorry, you can't make your kid happy on a Sunday. They should be happy with Jesus.

I've never really heard any of this. Certain That's outside of

tools and lawnmowers. Well, what if your fucking lawnmower breaks on Sunday and you got that's your day to mow the lawn?

This says the same thing about they can't sell them on consecutive Saturdays and Sundays. You have to pick a day, which is fucking. That's so strange.

What does that mean?

How this got developed has gotta be a weird story. I'm sure there has to be a reason, probably not a good one, but

The weird thing is like, if you couldn't buy liquor on Sunday, could you go to a restaurant and order a drink?

here you can order, I think, only beer and wine, you can't order liquor. Or it's like after Here before ten or before eleven or something like you mean, right that. Yeah,

now, today? Wait Wait. So if you go to a restaurant on a Sunday and you try to order an old fashioned, they won't let you. That seems now. wrong, that doesn't You cannot buy seem

liquor from package stores on Sundays in Texas, but you can buy beer, uh, beer and wine at grocery and convenience stores starting at ten a m. Uh,

what about restaurants?

restaurant can serve alcohol, but they're just starting at ten a m. on Sunday if the alcohol is sold along with the service of food. Oh, once, So you gotta buy food too,

What?

so so you can't just be a bar selling liquor. You gotta. It's also, I guess I've been to, no, that's not right. I've been to a bar where they're watch playing football and they're selling.

well, what about our bar?

They they probably have like a one chicken wing minimum, Maybe, I guess, kinda just maybe it is a loophole.

the they do have a food truck on premises What about or something.

our bar? What about Mitzi's

We're not open that early,

right? But what?

but it is Sunday, I guess

But it's Sunday, we're open on Sunday. Are we breaking the law? Breaking the law? Are we breaking

it says.

the law?

From ten am to noon, Oh, just that maybe it's this. Yeah, I'm, I'm, that's when you're supposed

to be in church.

so if you have breakfast, oh sorry, if you want some mimosas, you have to order.

yeah, it's ten am to noon, no food required. Afternoon. Okay, so Oh, so

There'll be a lot of mad people sitting afternoon. around waiting.

Stare at the clock is fucking stupid law.

that's the dumbest fucking law ever.

I used to, I when growing up in Ireland, I used to know lads like that would go down to the liquor store and they'd be waiting. Like it was their release. And fucking tickets to a like a concert. There would be a a line of people. Like nine am on a Sunday, just sitting around waiting for the liquor store. To to they got up early, well, no, no, they did they were up not get. They

all night.

stayed up all night. Yeah, they went to the gym first and then fucking went for a cu- no, they stayed up all night and then they'd go straight to the liquor store waiting. Jesus Christ, Or or you had the early houses, they have them in New York sometimes too, the early houses.

what's an early house?

An early house, uh, has a special license where it can open at like six o'clock, seven o'clock in the morning. Because it's it usually in a port. So the old fishermen apparently would get in off their shift, and they'd, so there used to be all these laws, you know, can't serve booze till ten. And they were like, well, we finish work at six am, so why? why can't I drink? So they would let individual spots and they have a few of them in New York still.

So when we would bartend, we would drink in the bar till six, seven, then we'd get a taxi over to the early house. And there'd be guys getting off work and we're all fucking steaming from the night before. We're we're wasted all night. New York is fun, It's so much fun.

there's so much po stuff to do, there's always something happening somewhere.

it's the yeah, that's. That's actually why I moved here was cause I visited New York when I was younger. I was like nineteen, and I just fell in love with the opportunity of how much stuff there was to do. I was like, no matter, I feel like, no matter who you are, you can find your little tribe of people in New York. yeah, you Cause you're like, can get a a

great meal at four in the morning, you can go to a restaurant and get a meal at four in the morning.

a little bit of that's died down, though. The restaurants Really, cause of Covid, you know, the the all the diners are twenty four hours, and the Covid and the they kind of stopped, and they kind of fucked up a lot of shit,

fucking Covid.

they kind of fucked up. Can I take it? This?

yeah. How long have you been over here for America?

I've been here since 2014. So

Did you start comedy in Ireland?

yeah, I, I was doing comedy for like two years out there.

What's it like out there? What's the scene

It's small, not many people out there, so it's like a small. It's like, not that easy to make a living.

is? Uh, is there clubs or is it There's open mics?

only really a couple of purposely built clubs. Most rooms are just like a a a room above a bar that's been converted and great and the C. The crowds are incredible in Ireland, they're small, uh, and they, they're almost like d doing a black room. Cause if you crush, you feel like a king, and if you bomb, you will regret everything that ever led to that. The Irish will you will bomb at the Irish. And then just quickly someone goes, Not funny, and then you've got fifteen more minutes going, fuck.

And he gets a big laugh and you go, Oh, what about this other thing? I saw, you know, but if you're going well, they love you. Yeah, yeah,

and is there a lot of good comics over there?

there's some great comics, yeah, a lot of them don't move out too much, they don't really get out of there. That's a problem, We got a couple of great guys. Well, there was

really?

a our biggest guy ever is probably Tommy Tiernan. I've heard of him, Tommy was massive and he used to go all over. And then I think he got rocked for saying he got like one of the first cancelled guys back in 2006. He made a joke about, um, if about Hitler didn't have enough ambition, and that 6 million wasn't enough. And then he. But he said it like casually on stage as a joke, and then someone wrote a huge article about it, and then that kinda fucked his whole touring over here.

His agents, his managers, everyone dropped him. And then he just goes, fuck it, I'll stay in Dublin, I'll stay in Ireland, because, uh, I got a fan base here, my family, so Tom so is the best.

so does he still perform in Ireland?

Tom Yeah, yeah, but I think he kind of only sticks to that that region. But he's, yeah, but he's a weird dude. Like, he's like a like an old witch type of a guy. Like where he'll see, like he'll have a stick, he'll walk around with a stick and he'll hit you with a poem. That doesn't make sense. And then he'll, he'll, then he, he jumps back into a hedge, like he is a very interesting. He has a huge talk show in Ireland right now, massive Really talk show.

Yeah, where he

on television?

get on television, they get a guest in that he doesn't know who the guest is. It's a surprise. So then he sits down and just like, starts talking to them and tries to f. He either knows them or or just tries to figure out what they're doing. Yeah,

Huh? What's it called?

uh, the Tommy Tiernan show, yeah, so book me, maybe. Yeah, for sure, Yeah, I'd love to do.

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he had, like, he was huge, big, huge in Canada, big in Australia, he was doing the tours in America. Had a comedy central hour at the time. And then I think it was like a post show live interview type of thing where someone Just one thing fucking someone actually asked around, a question. It's like, can you go too far? As a joke? And he said, No. And then I think he used that as an example. And some journalist just cherry picked that and said anti-Semitic, whatever, which is funny, cause if he did it today, he'd be a fucking king.

Because the anti-semitism's kind of been kinda cool,

It's in vogue.

it's kinda cool.

Yeah, it made a comeback. It really did. Yeah, As soon as Kanye started selling out stadiums again, everybody was like, Wow, that dude had a diamond encrusted swastika made. By the way, where do you think he got the diamonds? They money, got him from the Albanians, money, Joe. He think he got

goes, You what?

him, think he got him from the Italians.

There's gotta be an upcharge on the on the swastika.

We can make a deal, but we got to work something out. We got to go in through the back door. yeah, so A fucking diamond encrusted swastika. And the next thing, you know, the dude's selling out stadiums again, selling out enormous stadiums,

well, the the music slaps, slaps they slap.

the dude's nothing but bangers for fucking decades. That guy's been making

yeah, but he. But it's bangers, funny. When I s like, when I say anti-semitism, too, I'm like, kinda tongue-in-cheek, joking about the, uh, Israel stuff. But like he was actually doing some anti-Semitic stuff, right? Like he, like, uh, he was actually, I don't know what he was doing, but he was, he well, had. He had a

he was this.

song like, Uh, we, we are Hitler or something. What was the song he had?

yeah, Heil, it was Heil Hitler. Yeah, that was the song, and he apologized for And didn't he have that.

a song that was sucking Pussies. off his cousin at one point, too? No, he posted Am I crazy?

about that on Instagram that him and his cousin used to watch he had a song, porn, and he sucks his cousin's

he had a song. dick. He's like, I gave my cousin head, I gave my cousin head. It was Oh, really, a it was actually a banger. Yeah, it was again, you. It's like, he goes, What can I? I can? I'm so good. I make a song about sucking off my little cousin and it'll be, and it'll be great.

S that they blew each other when they were, like, fourteen. That kinda They wou would watch porn happens, and suck each other's dicks.

that kinda happens, you know,

I guess it does if it happened to him, and it clearly is a real thing. It's not like a, you know, UFO story where you're like, you gotta leave it up to whether or not you believe something fantastical that you've never experienced before.

I don't have the confidence to to ever admit that would happen, let alone write a great song about it and release it. You know,

And it's not like anybody confronted him with that information and he had to own up to it. No, he just posted it one day on Twitter. awesome, Yeah, I I think, he said love him he sucked his cousin's dick for years. for years. No, Yeah, yeah, yeah, I think he said it for years. Uh, Cousins, styled in all caps is a song by American rapper Kanye West. It was released on April twenty first, 2025, as intended, second single from his unreleased studio album, Cuck.

What a name. It first released a West Twitter account before being sent to streaming platforms in April 2023. Hip hop song. It samples, Uh, were the originals by Double Vergo and interpolates ten perks by David Blunt and such. Okay, uh, he was originally reluctant to write it, but has since reflected on how it positively impacted West. It was removed from streaming platforms November of 2020.

but but why? I mean, So you can't, you can't sing about that.

his friend is, uh, his cousin is actually in jail, it seems like previously spoken of a cousin who is currently serving a life sentence in jail for a murder he committed at seventeen years old. Uh, he mentioned him on Jimmy Kimmel Live in 2018, and the 2020 documentary Kim Kardashian West, The Justice Project. He added that his cousin is now serving a sentence for killing a pregnant woman. Oof. A few years after West told him they wouldn't look at dirty magazines together anymore, West believed that he was self-centered for taking the blame for his cousin's murder charge and for showing him those dirty magazines when he was six.

What?

this guy actually wrote the song, and Kanye performed the writing of it. Yeah, same with the, uh, other song you guys are talking about.

American rapper David Blunt, who served as the main songwriter for Cuck, just like just having that in your Wikipedia, what'd you do? Well, I was the main songwriter for Cuck. Oh, excellent, amazing. How was that collaboration? Uh, while West was playing The Last of Us on his PlayStation five, uh, West originally declined Blunt's offer to turn into a song, but later changed his mind. Though Blunt's had become reluctant to write it, attempting to procrastinate by sending West different songs for the album.

He eventually decided to record it as a demo in his living room due to West's persistence. He persisted. He's like, write it, write about me sucking my cousin's dick, right? He didn't over a beat he downloaded from YouTube due to his main producer's being asleep. That's hilarious. The fucking guy's working So funny, like twenty four hours a day. Blunt took around twenty minutes to finish the song. He later reflected on Cousins as being very freeing for West when he made it, believing that West chose him to write it.

Due to his blunt, in quotes, uh, no pun intended, approach to songwriting that lacks double entendres, uh, according to producer Chucky Beats. He was unaware that West used Blunt's song Ten Perks, which he co-wrote and produced until YouTube commenter told him about the ex post. So what was the ex post? What did he say? So there was a there was a post, yeah, where he just came but out and said it does he sucks. make sense His cousin's dick.

that he writing that song helps him deal with it. They say that with, like any PTSD, where it's like, if you can journal about the whatever the things are,

Oh, here it is. It says the song is called Cousins about my cousin that's locked in jail for killing a pregnant lady a few years ago. I told him we after I told him we wouldn't look at dirty magazines together anymore. Perhaps in my self-centered mess, I felt it was my fault that I showed him those dirty magazines when he was six, and then we acted out what we saw. My dad had Playboy magazines, but the magazines I found on top of my mom's closet were different.

My main name is Ye, and I sucked my cousin's dick until I was fourteen. Yay, sorry, tweet sent okay,

awesome. Good for him. Jesus, Six to fourteen, that's a long time, that's a long time to be sucking cock. Yeah,

and then one day he's like, enough. and And then he blames that on his cousin shooting his him. brother went on Right, S a Yeah, S Dave Blunts he's the guy who wrote it. Wow, okay,

big, huh?

he's a big fella. I can see why he procrastinates. Hard to have energy when you're that big. Hard to, you know, be I know I'm r super motivated

energy now.

to write a write a good song. That's a crazy story, man. But I mean, all brilliant people like that, like that, are that good are gonna be insane.

yeah, yeah, I guess. So, yeah, Yeah, in a a little.

bunch of different ways, but they're all insane in some way.

Didn't he say he can, like, see, like colors with sound? He said that he has that thing that when he hears sound, he like visualizes it.

Did he say that? That makes That's, yeah, sense? I mean, clearly, as a gift

he's definitely one of the most talented. ever. Yeah, Yeah, I they're bangers.

mean, and uh, when you talk to him, it's like his words are like barely contained inside of his mouth. Synesthesia. He has a neurological condition where auditory input, such as music or sound, triggers involuntary visual experiences, like seeing colors, shapes, or patterns. Makes sense.

So when he hears songs, it's like doing mushrooms or something.

Like, when you're talking to him, it's almost like these words are like pouring out of his mouth. Like it's like behind his brain, like they're just coming out.

No filter.

I mean, I think that's how he writes, too. I think it's just like there's a creative storm inside of his brain that's just flying out of him all the time.

Yeah, well, it goes to show for what he did, and, uh, for like, his what he was saying and everything, and how much people are like, trying to cancel him, I guess. And now he's back to selling out huge fucking I know it's stadiums.

M. It's nuts, I think. I mean, at some point in time, they must have just given up on trying to cancel him. But the the crazy thing is like, Adidas backed away from their sponsorship and it cost them billions of dollars, billions. Cause he was basically saying the Jews control everything. And they didn't like No,

that, so they fired him. so they they killed Yeah,

his bank accounts, they basically controlled everything.

wait to prove em wrong, I guess,

I know it's so funny that they did that, they didn't you know, just ignore him. But it's a we. It's a weird time for, uh, anti-Jewish thinking and rhetoric.

yeah, well, it all just boils over from the Israel thing. And then and then while we're here, we're kinda like, by the way, you're a little annoying also, by the way, just so you know, while while we're talk, while I'm breaking it to you, you guys are a little fucking irritating.

They're very into being Jewish, and if you're And they love not Jewish, America. Yeah, yeah,

they love being a Jew.

must be fun.

They stop me a lot of time in New York, they'll ask me if I'm Jewish a lot. Cause, you know, there, like, there's like a special week where they like, hand out fucking Jew buy bills or whatever they have. You know, I don't know why, I honestly Quora thought, Yeah, the Torah. And then they'll stop me. These guys with the curls and everything, they'll stop me. And be like, Are you Jewish? And I go, No, like, Oh, okay, but they They're gonna but they be upset the

at you.

no, they're not upset, no, but they they think I'm a Jew. I must have some sort of, uh, something going on,

What do you think that is?

I don't know.

You could be? Well, that's the thing about being Jewish. It's not like being Somalian, you know, where you can go, that guy looks Somalian, you know what I mean? Like, Jewish could be red hair. Yeah,

I think that's where the sneaky, the sneaky Jew comes from. I do think that's where the the the theory of the sneaky Jew is. because you Because, y,

can't spot him.

yeah, yeah, yeah, well, you can spot some of them, like Yeah, Ari's Ari Shafir, you're

up there.

fucking, yeah, you, whoa, you know, everything about Ari is Jewish.

Yeah, you spot that shit a mile away with Ari.

Ari's like, too Jewish, where he needs to, like, dilute the blood a little. Maybe You know, get an operation like where you've already had do you start?

a hair the nose 100%, but then you're gonna have to widen the face. Cause like, yeah, like, the thing about faces, that's like, uh, one of the things that you notice if you see someone that got a nose job like something looks wrong. Like, why is your nose normal size and the rest of your face is strange, you know? Cause that's the golden ratio, like there's like, there's a symmetry to the way your face is structured.

That if you have the type of face that's supposed to have a big nose, and all of a sudden you get this little Michael Jackson button nose.

doesn't work.

Y, Yeah, you look weird, like something about your mind is like, the ratios are off and you're like, something's wrong here,

that would be my biggest fear. Probably to go under the knife, trying to be more handsome. And then you come out with, like, a fucking, like, a fucked up lip or something, right? And you know,

then your face doesn't move. So every time you you might look okay when you're staring at the mirror, but then as soon as you start talking, your face looks like it's made out of rubber.

what's gonna look? What? What are all these like young twenty year olds who are getting botox gonna look like when they're forty? Are they just gonna have a fucking mask on? Like, just

Well, it's the fillers, the fillers are the real problem. Botox is not great, but it's you're basically putting botulism in your skin, and it can also cause a bunch of other side effects. But I think the real problem is those fillers. Like some people have to get their face removed and scrape the fillers out.

what? Yeah, man, some What do you? What do you mean? some, They get their face removed?

yeah, you. They literally have to, like, fucking open your face up and remove the fillers. Like some ladies Like, when went a little Peeler back, too far. like Terminator, I don't know the procedure, but I know that they have to get something in your skin underneath there and suck it all out. Depending on the fillers

some of them look good, though. with the fillers, Well, just like, like that with their work.

beast, unlook.

No, I'm talking like, what's what's the oldest Kardashian? the the Queen, the Queen of the Kardashians? Not the kids, the the older lady.

yeah, yeah, what is her name? Chris Chris? Yeah,

It's cause she, I don't know who she's working with, but she must have some wizard, a she must have a wizard. She has Tommy a squad, Tiernan she, yeah, she has a squad. Tommy. It has a little prayer from for prayer,

Cast a spell. and yeah, He used his warlock magic but she to turn her young

must, she, she. They. again. That's like a big project for these guys, they probably have. That's not a simple fix. She's like 109, and she looks eighteen. Those are artists, by Look at the way, that's that, a filter, that's fine,

that's not what she really looks like. There's no way they did that to her neck. Like, like, when you see her in real life on her television show, she does look very good for her age, yeah, and then but she doesn't look like that.

and then Caitlyn did the opposite. Caitlyn could not look worse. Yeah, that's Poor Caitlyn's like giving up, like, sad, actually, like you like, she'll walk in with a big handbag fucking, and and the hair, weird. the hair's all naughty, and it's like, spooky,

Yeah, it's weird.

sp spooky.

Well, I think once you've given up on sex and then you've kinda, it's also it's like, Did Caitlyn Jenner have the excuse me bottom surgery? Is I don't that been confirmed?

think so, I don't think so.

I think she did.

She walks like she has a cock.

Yeah, well, she used to, I think,

you, I guess you don't, uh, adjust that probably keep must.

the same strut.

That must be hard to adjust to not having a cock. Yeah, long time ago, Like, you ever get a tooth taken out

Long time ago had the surgery. yeah, according to her Yikes, memoir,

but do you ever get like a tooth taken out or something? And it's like, you? It's like, weird to adjust to it for a while. it felt good Not having a penis must be fucking. Might and now take take a now you have, while.

but now you have a tube, you have a hole that you have to keep dilated with a rubber

And it comes with instructions dick. on how to clean it properly and shit. Do you ever clean a pocket pussy? It's the most disgusting thing I've ever done in my life.

We used to have a sponsorship with a flashlight.

Yeah, and but that's the problem is that it's all fun and games until you gotta wash it. And then you, you're just like, just rub our sleeve under the sink It's fucking and it's dead squid, go. Ah, Bruh. yeah, I got one at home too. It's got. It was a gift, it was a gift on a on a podcast. Some chick, some porn star was like, I guess she'd like

Oh, had it molded from her own.

dip their pussy in in clay or whatever. Very The fuck, yeah, and then she was handing. Yeah, classy, nice, mine was scented.

yeah. I watched an episode of the Kardashians where they were all sitting around the living room and and Caitlyn came over, and it was just just like, What, what are you know? It's one thing to be I saw that an old person. same episode, I think Yeah, being an old person is okay. Like, you know, you get old, we're all gonna get old, we're all gonna look shit when we get old, but that's different.

Caitlyn's a real fuck.

You have, like, crazy long hair and fake boobs, and you look insane, you look like an old man with fake boobs.

Yeah, I just think if I was to become a lady, I think I'd be a real fucking femme bitch. You think, so, I think I'd be a bad bitch. Or at really, least I'd be doing my best to be. I don't what do you think I would. think you would do I think I would fucking go out with the girls shopping, really get them to compliment me, make me feel good. Yeah, I think I'd have a nice haircut, I would, I'd shave.

Probably that could be a good start.

right? Maybe just get laser f shit all over your face I'd get laser so that it doesn't, shit everywhere, everything doesn't grow back. lasered. Yeah, Yeah, you don't wanna worry about stubble, like, you know, why are you eating pussy, pretending to be a lesbian? That's the thing about the weir. The weird ones are the ones that they do it and then they're still straight. That's called autogynephilia. autogynephilia, Yeah, they get aroused by the idea of pretending to be a woman, and they get sexually aroused and they're attracted to women.

right? But do they only do that in the bedroom, or is this like they have? They well, have to live it like that all the time?

not anymore now that these

Cause we, we, while I

the new openness of our society allows them to go out in public and get excited and go into the women's room with a hard cock. Yeah,

don't blame em.

this is the thing about, like, being open and progressive and just being like, you know, accepting of people, that you're accepting also of sexual deviants. Like there are people that aren't just transgender, they're fucking perverts and sex offenders, the old school ones, like when I was a kid, there was just old school sex offenders. It was normal. And now they just identify as a woman and they get a willy wonka golden ticket. He could just,

what do you mean? They get, they get sent to, like, a a female prison or whatever.

well, they definitely can do that in some places. California, at last count, when I looked, had forty seven biological males that were housed in women's prisons. Some of them have gotten women pregnant. They keep their dick. There's like, there's no requirement in terms of as long as you identify, New Jersey's the same way, as long as you identify. It's it's like there's a self-identification thing. You identify as a woman, you're allowed to go into a women's prison.

do they In some places,

make you do some? Do they make you, like, put on like high heels or anything and kinda like, really?

I don't think they get high heels in There's, there's gotta be prison. a test, I don't think there is.

there's gotta be some sort of a feminine test, All you have you know what to do I mean?

is get offended if they suggest that you're not a woman, Yeah, that's you know?

all you gotta do. Yeah,

They're like, I'm a fucking woman, but just you're like, Okay,

some female tests where you go like, Oh, it's, you know, it's. It's my dad's birthday, I'm not gonna buy him a card, and she's like, you have to buy him a card. You know, they can go really test them, you know, should I call my father today? And she's like, you know, and he's like, Nah, he goes. That's a

that's true.

very man manly response right there, very manly response.

Yeah, it's, uh, I mean, look, I wouldn't want to be f the type of person who feels like you're trapped in the wrong body. It's gotta be horrible. I'm, and it's not like I don't have sympathy for them, but it. My position has always been like, Hey, but whatever happened to perverts? Do you know you've just given perverts a license to be around women by just saying that they're a woman? You're, you know, there's no way of dis.

There's no distinction, there's no way to, there's no way to to differentiate between someone who has gender dysphoria and someone who's just a pervert who's operating out of a loophole.

yeah, I. But you could probably argue that's the same everywhere in life, right? In terms of like, That's a you know, big one, though, yeah,

that's a big one.

but people are scamming any everywhere, there's con artists everywhere, you know, I, I, I could be from fucking, I could be from America and pretending to be Irish. Cause I thought this would be like a a way to fucking swindle people.

If you were, you would really be like wasting your talent at voices, you know,

Well, my my accent's barely Irish anymore. My accent's every. I I know, for a fact, everyone in Ireland is gonna be watching this, going fucking stupid American accent. What's he doing? that's crazy, Cause it's soft as shit and it's it's real soft. Cause all my friends are Irish, my wife's Irish, sorry, all my friends are American, my wife's American. I just sort of talk around them and I podcast so much that you hear the the yeah, but you've got accent.

the the dir dirt, there's a dirt, Yeah, there's a stupid thick and a dirt. There's shit. a way that Irish people talk that differentiates them from other people. With

yeah. And then when I go home, I s I, I, I suck it in. Everyone, I'm listening to, I get it back. It's thick as shit, and then I come back here and no one understands me for a week. And then it just sort of disappears, it floats away.

see to me, you sound very Irish. Yeah,

but to them, I sound like a prick. really, Rea Yeah, yeah,

like you've softened up.

softened up a lot. There's all clips of me on YouTube and stuff where my accent's thick as shit. Conor McGregor style fucking. What's the story? How's everybody doing? And now now I'm like, going to d, put the trash, put the trash out or whatever.

what do you? mean? you're saying, put dirt trash.

Yeah, I guess there's little things in there, yeah,

little right there.

yeah, but to them, this is very they'll notice this, they'll notice little things. And they and they'll DM me and call me a fraud and a faggot, and I'm like, I'm sorry, I just. There's not enough Irish people in my life anymore.

How often do you go back?

Uh, I usually go back twice a year. Um, this year, this year I didn't go back, but next year I've got like four trips booked already. I got a bunch of shows. If anyone wants to come out and see me, please come see me. Yeah, I'm doing shows in Dublin and, uh, Limerick and Cork. that's fucking cool, Yeah, I'm excited to go back. Yeah, I've never been able to, like, I have a bigger audience here, cause like M.

Most of my career has been here. And everyone, like that, has been to Legion of Skanks and Ari and all these type of fans have come to me. So I don't really have the Irish accent, so, or sorry, I don't really have the Irish audience. So I go

that's ridiculous. back, yeah, Because they get online too, they must be they do. I seeing it.

have a few, I have a few, but if I was in Ireland doing jokes about fucking Ireland, that I would be, I think I'd be much bigger. I, When you uh,

go back, do you have a bunch of Irish material about Ireland? uh, not really. No, No,

no, well, it's. It changes, the place changes so much. I don't know. I have stuff about my dad I talk about a lot. I'll talk about my dad a lot. Like my dad, he's very Irish dad, you know what I mean? And, uh, just like a. He's just like a in interesting guy. He used to be really angry my whole life, and then one day I think he stopped working and now he's the nicest guy. You know, I think there's something about your f.

Uh, someday your. I think your dad is a mean prick until one day when you're like, a a grown up. And then they just go, Ah, you're all right, like they ease, ease off, you know,

well, one thing that happens is you get out of their house, so they don't have to take care of you anymore. they stop, That changes they can't, a lot.

write, they stop writing again, they get the fuck out of there.

yeah, the you get out of their house and you're not their responsibility anymore, and then they can relax when they're around you. And then if you're doing all right with your life, you've developed a career or what have you, then they're all right when they're around you.

but my my dad, m my friends used to call my my dad's name is Aidan. My friends used to have a nickname for him called Ragin Aiden, cause he was just known as such a notorious shithead. And one time we were we were at eighteen or seventeen, we were going to a concert. And two of my friends were in the house. We were just drinking, pre-drinking, and he came home from work or whatever. And he's like, Hey, how's it going?

And he's like, raging, and he's like, mad. And then he's just. At one point, someone made a joke, and he goes, Get the fuck out of my house, all he's, get the fuck out of my house. And he grabbed the beers and threw them out into the street. He goes, Get the fuck out of here. And my friend Bill, he walked off down the road, and then my dad comes out and goes, Bill, come here, get back here, get back here.

And we walked all the way up. He goes, Get the fuck out of my face. He just saw a rat and that

Just hate his job.

I don't know. Yeah, he used to work as a plumber, so I think he just hated his job. I think he was just stressed about financial shit and everything. And now he's like, retired, and he gardens, and he's a sweet little old, pathetic man. It's n he's like a. He's like my, my, my nieces have the best version of him ever. He's just in the garden all day, just planting, and he'll send me photos of flowers.

That's like, I'm like, who is this guy? What happened? Yeah,

Well, how many people are ruined by a job they hate that they have to show up every day? Just be living in shit and stress all day long and then come home and realize that all that work that you did and you still can barely pay your pay your bills. That's the problem. Yeah, Mo, I mean, what's that Thoreau quote? Most men live lives of quiet desperation. Yeah, that's heavy shit, and it's true. Most men are out there working right now, not that women aren't, but you know, that's the it's the male quote.

Because it's the there's something about working these brutal, horrible jobs, where you're still barely making enough money for food. It's crazy and you're wasted your life, and then all of a sudden you're sixty, you know, and then you're like, Well, what am I doing?

yeah. It's tough. In America sometimes, too. It's like, you wanna go to, you go to Waffle house, and it's nice, cause Waffle house is great. But the people working there are like the saddest humans alive. Like, it's like they're no one wants to be a waffle house. They're like, just all there, Not only that, blacked.

it's you're gonna see fights five nights a week.

Yeah, yeah, they're exhausted.

The odds of going to a waffle house and seeing a brawl are very high.

Uh, what is it about? It's like the fucking bat signal, a fucking aggressive.

I know more so than a diner, like it's very rare you see a brawl in a diner, like a twenty four hour No, Denny's, diner.

no one's ever fought in Denny's in Most of the life. Waffle time, people just House is a fucking royal rumble. Waffle House is just viral video after viral video. Are I know, they organizing it? Maybe I don't think like, is that like so. a good thing?

I think it's where waffle houses are. It's probably like they're in an area that's like more fucked up or something. But I mean, when you're drunk and it's like two o'clock in the morning and you can get waffles, like, fuck, yeah, with butter and syrup,

and and you can get everything eggs, oh, chicken bacon, fucking fried steak, anything you want. let's go, And you can sit in a little booth booth with a couple of friends. have some And

coffee, talk some shit.

yeah, and then next thing, you know, some some fat bitch skips you in the line or something, and then fucking waffle house, brawl. But you ever see that one with the where the the the lady who worked there, skinny little white chick with tattoos fucked them all up. She was this tiny skinny girl and all these big fucking, uh, fat ladies are screaming at her, going, I'm gonna fuck you up, but she came out, she goes, you wanna fucking go?

Cause the the people that work there aren't like chumps either. They have to go through some sort of probably

it's called jail.

they have to do a minimum of jail, they have to have a jail experience to work at Waffle House. Yeah,

Yeah, how many salt and batteries you have? Okay, three,

you could be a manager, you can go train all the other staff how to defend themselves. At two o'clock in the morning from a fork to the neck. Yeah,

oi oi, yeah. And it doesn't close, that's the other thing. Like, if you're a person looking for something to eat or do, and it's four o'clock in the morning, you don't have a lot of options. And those people, if you're up that late, most likely you've made some poor choices

yeah, may well, or good, I don't know.

or good ones.

Great ones, but, you know, I grew up in Ireland. Fist fights all the time, so when we w the nightclubs used to end at four o'clock in the morning in Dublin city center and everyone stayed out till four. It was like it, it, it wasn't even an option to go home before the bar closed. If that makes sense, I've never in my life heard of someone going, Ah, it's two o'clock, I better go. You go, No, just two more hours of drinking.

We're here. That's that's just the way it worked. I don't know why we just love it so much and we What is drink.

why is that?

I I think, well, apparently, the Vikings used to have to drink a lot of alcohol because that would kill the bacteria in the water. So there's, I think there's probably some sort of a thing that was just passed down through generations of, uh. I also think it's probably a whole lot of, uh, repressed fucking trauma over the years that we can only let out. W when we get blackout drunk and puke. Uh, that's our therapy, you know?

There are a lot of stories in ancient days of people who drank nothing but beer, they just drank beer. That's what they're out, so everyone was drunk all the time, which is really crazy if you think but you, you, about it

you get to a point where you're kind of you're not dr drunk drunk, but you're kind of buzzed all day, every day. You're just a little bit horny, just a little bit.

And also like the just the liver poisoning, like,

Yeah, but you're probably dying in your sixties back then anyway, probably killed kinda by a sword fucking the honorable way to go.

yeah, before you're ever getting liver Nice. But disease.

they did that at the Guinness brewery in Dublin, too. All these guys would, the old Coopers would make the the barrels, and they'd make millions of these per year. And they had a free supply of Guinness to drink all day. So these guys would go to work and they would drink twelve pints of Guinness all day while they're fucking working. And then after work, they'd go down to the Guinness bar, the pub, and spend their spend the money they just And keep rolling earned.

And yeah, and then actually start drinking the the one, the the one that during the day was, uh, moderation. yeah, yeah, they. And and you got a job there when you were twelve, and you were drinking six pints a day from twelve. Everyone was drinking young, everyone's drinking young. When my dad was growing up, he he would go to pubs when he was twelve, like, so Holy shit, he's like seventy now, so that was back in the day.

holy shit.

But like, it's just a drinking culture. And it's eighteen now, which means the law's eighteen, but we let you at fifteen if you're a chick, sixteen if you're a fella. That's the

That's when people started drinking yeah, five, in pubs.

uh, in nightclubs, or, sure, because you'd use your. I used my older brother's ID when I was. He was four years older than me, so he was eighteen, so he would have been tw twenty and I was sixteen, using his ID. But all the girls I grew up with would go in even younger, cause the Bouncers like, see a Q fifteen year old walk up, they kinda let them go in. Then I walk in, like fucking covered in pimples, like a fucking moron.

They go, Nah, you're not let in, and I go, Well, that was my girlfriend. He goes, Not tonight.

There's, uh, some sort of a series on, Uh, I think it's on Netflix about the Guinness family. Have you seen it?

yeah, yeah, yeah, there's a there's like a

I heard it's crazy.

it's, it's a drama. It's like a Peaky Yeah,

Blinders type deal.

it's kinda we. Yeah, it's weird, the accents are weird and everything, so it's like it's tough to watch. And they sound like I fucking sound, but, uh,

It sounds shitty, like it doesn't can't sound like a good Irish accent.

And not not all of them, but some of them are from Ireland. But yeah, So is no,

it, uh, American actors faking it?

it's a it's. It's, by the way, it's loosely loosely based on the this certain generation of the Guinness family.

Can we listen to some of this? Loosely and, of course, our bit

Thoughts and prayers are most of all with Sir Benjamin Lee Guinness's four children.

from the creators of Peaky Blinders? away now A gift

from a representative of the Dublin poor. trouble is brewing I so together. think

that would be trouble today. The man's name is Guinness. Of course, they'll be fucking trouble. So that accents Yeah, he's a brick, bullshit, he's, he, he,

faking it.

yeah, but. But that little guy they had as a leprechaun, for some reason, they literally in introduced him. He goes, I fucking none of them. I'll I'll sell your Guinness in New York, so I will, you know, I need that, that little attitude, you know? It's like everyone in Ireland's going, This is Muggy's night.

It's kind of amazing with people being that drunk all the time that anything ever got done.

Poetry, that's a d, you know, the writing, we did all that, we never, we never did. We never figured out, like, you know, uh, you know, finance or any of that important shit. But we, we, we had a good time, we have a good time, Yeah, a lot you know, and of poetry, and a and

lot of singing.

a lot of singing, dancing, plays, writing, talking, we talk s non-stop about everything, everything. And like, a conversation in Ireland is one of the most fun thing. Cause you'll be laughing one second and then crying the next. And it's sort of just a a a rollercoaster of. They love getting into the nitty-gritty of, like, horrible things, for some reason. Ir Irish people, we feed on misery, you know,

Taboo's thing, probably it's a depressant.

I, Yeah, I just, I don't know what it is. I think it's just we have to fill the dead air. So it's like, anytime I talk to him. And I didn't really notice this until I started bringing my wife to Ireland. And she's like, very heavy subjects. And I was like, I never even noticed. But like, we'd be having the the dinner, and then suddenly my mom would just go, Oh, you know, your cousin, uh, she was dating a guy called Jerry.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, he died. He's fucking got hit by a car last night, you know? And, uh, or they'll, they'll bring up someone who lost a baby or whatever, just all the time. It's always like, just misery. And you're like, I don't even know this guy, what are you telling me? I don't know about my cousin. What the fuck are you talking about? And they love it, though, they love a little bit of fucking misery.

What do you think that is?

I don't know, I think it comes, I don't know. Probably passed down from, like the famine or something, where, where we, where we, where we talked about it, you know, cause the famine's a weird one. That kind of still What was the still rocked the world.

cause of the famine? The British, The British did it. What did they do?

they took all our food, they left they. So the when Britain was in control of Ireland in the eighteen hundreds, was that was the date? Um, well, there was like two, two major famines, right? I'm probably getting the dates wrong, but they gave the Catholics the shittier land. They took off they. They pushed the Catholics off the good land that could grow carrots and cabbage and and whatever. They pushed them to the shitty land, and the only thing that could grow on the shitty land was the potatoes.

And then when the potato blight happened, it wiped out the potatoes. It was the entire food source, but we were still producing loads of food, but that was all getting shipped over to the crown, so the the crown. So it was like a forced ex, uh, forced famine, or forced starvation. Even

How many people died?

I don't know, I don't know the number, but it it rocked the and the amount of people that left, too.

Holy shit. Between 1845 and 1852, about one million people died from starvation and disease, and roughly 2 million emigrated between 1845 and 1855. Potato blight triggered the crisis, but poverty, dependence on one crop, and the British government policies made its consequences far worse. A fucking million people I think a lot in less of people in than ten years,

Ireland, a lot of people in Ireland, would think that's a little bit too favorable to how much the British government actually played a role in that shit. But, uh, but I don't know where my family was back then, you know, I don't know, so I don't know how many ancestors I would have had back then. It must be like a hundred or something like people that I'm came from. I don't know who was affected by it, who was doing well, I don't know, like,

Probably no one was doing real well. Sounds like I don't know, it sounds like if there's a starvation going on, it's probably rough times.

if you're poor, if you're, if you're living in a nice house and you're fucking doing something, but One I don't.

of the most painful facts is that the food continued to leave Ireland while people starved. The story is not simply that Ireland exported food, imported none. Grain imports also rose sharply. The crucial distinction between the food being available in the economy and starving people having the money or assistance needed to obtain it. Crop failure alone does not explain the scale of the deaths, so perplexity is giving us the nuance details.

It says this guy worsening Perplexity. inactions of Lord John Russell's government worsening the disaster.

But they say, does it does it gene it affected the gene? does it does it? is it? Does a gene where certain Irish people, uh, can use less calories that their body will store the calories because they survived through those times of no. And

right. Yeah, I've heard of that before, like, if cause I was told that's there's a longevity gene that's associated with it. really, Yeah, like people that are the descendants of starving people apparently live longer, and they're more robust

really? But what if if you have an infant? It's like, it's like, you know, today's world, we're so focused on making sure all our infants and everyone has got got the good shit. You know, there was an entire generations of kids who were born not getting nutrients into their brain. So would that have, like, a long term effect on? Because eventually they on IQs grew up? Would

and things.

they be like, you know, stupid for lack of a better word? And

It's a good question.

then they passed that on, like, would that have affected the the national average I Q of Ireland?

It's a good question.

Is that why we like to drink and dance so much? Cause we're all we starved ourselves a little dumb.

Well, it sounds like it's embedded in the culture, and that could be because of that. I wonder what life was like before the famine. This episode is brought to you by Perplexity. You've heard me say it all the time, put it in Perplexity. It's what I use for research. You ask it a question, it gives you a straight answer, and it shows you where it got the information so you can check the sources yourself. But sometimes you don't just need an answer, you need something done.

So Perplexity built a new product called Perplexity Computer. You give it a real job and it researches, works across your files and apps, and comes back with a finished thing, a report, a spreadsheet, it'll even build you an app. So whatever you've been putting it off, hand Perplexity Computer the job. Try it at P P L X dot a I slash Joe Rogan.

I don't think it was great either.

That doesn't seem like it was

It was great before the English showed up, and then they kind of pushed us off our land and everything. But that's why the Irish love Palestine so much, because they just built in our system, built in our culture of supporting the underdog. I guess, W You know, um, no matter what the going on, I think we just will naturally side towards the people who are getting genocided rather than the other people. Well, I mean, That's

that's kind of across the whole world now.

now it is now, yeah,

You know, th that's the weird thing about Jewish people in America, that's their no. There's a lot of people that I know, uh, I love them to death, but they have a blind spot, and that blind spot is their Jewish identity in Israel. And they refuse to say it's a it's a genocide, they refuse to condemn it, and they they come up with reasons why they had to bomb those buildings.

of course.

And Hamas did this, and Hamas did that, and October seventh this, and

Yeah, I'm kind of over it now, though. I kind of wish Israel would just kind of hurry up, wipe them off so we can move on. But I don't think it's, I think it's just it's going on a little long now, Joe, and I don't think they're gonna change anything. So wipe em out, wipe out West Bank, and then, like, why is Michael Moore back in my timeline because of Israel? yeah, well, So

because he made that stance, it's a free Palestine.

but there wouldn't have been a stance to make if Israel just hurry up and wipe em out. Because they're not gonna stop, they're not gonna stop, it's gonna just keep going. Jesus Don't you think it's got like, Christ, call do you see a do you see a settle down, solution?

lad. Are you trying to be the 2026 Tommy Tiernan?

That wasn't bad, actually. Oh, fuck karma. Um, sure,

Yeah, I, uh. The weird thing is they just had an election, right? And so Netanyahu might be out, and apparently this new guy is more hardcore than Netanyahu.

really. Oh, I thought it was gonna swing the other way.

Listen, I'm very peripherally paying attention to this. It's like, what's going on over there? Oh God, like, I read an article like one paragraph in, I shut the laptop, I'm like, I can't do there's only so this,

much you can take in.

I don't want to take any more anymore. I I feel completely overwhelmed, and the days that I feel great are the days that I don't absorb anything.

Yeah, 100%.

I stay offline, I stay out of the social media and whatever people are screaming about. Live updates, uh, close race sets the stage for weeks of negotiations over the next government. Neither Prime Minister Minister Benjamin Netanyahu nor his main challenger. How do you say that name? Gadi? Eisenkot were projected to gain a parliamentary majority. Okay, so they're gonna duke it out, and maybe someone dies in a bomb. Weeks of negotiation and maybe a drone attack. Fuck.

I saw it.

But he's rough, though, right? Isn't he? Like, Uh, he's pretty hardcore. I saw Find out

they said it was 16% turnout, and it was a record number of votes or something.

that's crazy.

Just cause everyone lives in Brooklyn, or most Israel people or something live in America. I think they can. Is that Most what? What? of them, Well, obviously they, I don't know, but I think a lot a lot of them live in America, a lot of Israelis. Is that why it's only 16%? Cause that's even that's particularly low.

that seems crazy.

This is, by the way, just a tweet that I saw that I'm gonna take as fact. But

What's a good election in America? What's what's our turnout? I don't fifty, think fifty's good.

I think I I believe 50% of people in America vote, and then it's half and half, pretty much neck and neck, even though, you know, this way. And then of that half, ha like,

So here it says less hardcore in domestic politics and political style, but not clearly less hardline on military force or Palestinian statehood. Eisenkot is better understood as a security hawk, offering an alternative to Netanyahu's leadership and far-right allies, not a dovish dovish alternative to Israel's security policy. On military force, very hawkish. Former Israeli military chief Eisenkot broadly supported operations in Gaza, Lebanon and Iran, associated with, Uh, how do you say that word? Dahiya, Dahiya doctrine, uh, using overwhelming force, including against civilian infrastructure, to deter enemy attacks.

His quieter manner should not be mistaken for reluctance to use devastating force. Oh, fun, what a fun place, fun. I know people that go back over there to visit, like Jewish folks. I'm like, why? This seems like a risky place to visit. Seems like anything could pop off over there at any Have you ever been moment.

to a war zone? No, have you No, but I I feel like,

you want to?

no, I don't, but I feel like you could be fucking, you could wake, wake me up a little, I had, just fucking

uh, Rick Springfield on the, you know, Jesse's girl, you know, that guy, Oh, we should. Jesse's I had a crush. So girl. Great when he song. was eighteen, he went to Vietnam, uh, to perform for the troops. He was in a band, and, uh, he was in a fucking war zone. Like, they got shot at, like he lobbed mortars and apparently killed one of the Viet Cong.

they had, they threw him a fucking grenade a lo sort of thing.

yeah, yeah, yeah, they they, they were lobbing mortars, and one of the guys told them, Hey, you got one. And so this is like, to this day, it fucks with him, cause he's in his seventies now. And he's like, I didn't, I fucking killed a guy when I was eighteen.

I didn't sign up for that, I was well, right?

he didn't sign up for anything, he was over there to perform music.

And they just got ambushed or something like that, and they they said, you gotta fight your way out.

no, they just allowed him to do it. Hey, you wanna, you wanna drop a bomb? Oh, it was like, It's like, a this is a Yeah,

this is an easy kill. Would you like to take the kill?

I, uh, something along those lines. Would you like to participate? You know, we have some bombs, Well, we'd like we'd like to to kill this guy, drop.

but it's it's pretty easy. He's already wounded, you can have him if Well, you want.

he's trying to kill you, so what are you gonna do? Yeah, you wanna lob a bomb? And I I guess he did.

I think Vietnam is all time. One of the scariest ideas to me ever being in the jungle. Like, do you ever just walk through the woods of the forest anywhere? And it's a little spooky, but being in a jungle a lot without the Vietnamese trying to kill you, just walking through that jungle alone, between the snakes and everything, the tigers, you know,

Not only that, you don't know that area, and they've been living there their whole lives and they dig tunnels. And some guys would have to climb into the tunnels to kill the Vietnamese.

fuck that, fuck that. I'm Imagine not, I'm, I'm. the nightmares, I'm gonna overeat, so I can't fit in the fucking things or something. I'm finding some re reason,

right? Cause some of those tunnels were pretty small. tiny little things. Yeah, Yeah, cause the Vietnam people were very small people.

but even if I like, when I go camping and stuff like that, I'll be in middle of the night, just hear it, like, you'll hear a twig snap from something. And I'm scared. It's a fucking whatever, mountain lion or something, if knowing it was a human with a fucking carrying a knife in his mouth and fucking sneaking in to sleep, my throat. That can't. That's not scared, and that. And then these guys were just sent back and were supposed to just fucking listen to the mommas and the papas or whatever.

Everyone else is dancing, smoking weed, going, Hey, welcome back, and these guys are like, Yeah, I'm fried.

And they're doing heroin and they're fucking hanging out, and everyone knows the war is bullshit and you're probably gonna die. There's no reason to be over there, no, none of it makes any sense. And now we know that the entire premise for entering into the war was fabricated. really. The Gulf of Tonkin incident,

Yeah, I'm not familiar.

the Gulf of Tonkin incident is a false flag that occurred, um, during the B before the war got popped off. There was already some operations over there, and they, uh, claimed that the uh, n the Viet Cong had attacked and blown up an American warship in the Gulf of Tonkin. It never happened. It's all fake. And, uh, because, we and not only that, one of the guys that was involved in that, perpetrating that, was Jim Morrison from the Doors.

It was his dad. really Yeah, his dad. There's a lot of, like, crazy shit involved in, like the musical movement of the nineteen sixties. There's a great book called Uh, it's not, I wouldn't say a great book, it's a weird book. Was it Strange Times in the Canyon? Is that what it's called? Something like that? But it's all about how many of these people from the counterculture movement in the sixties had connections to military intelligence. Yeah, it's very weird,

Weird scenes, like you just

weird scenes.

weird, weird scenes inside the canyon. So, like

it was almost orchestrated for particular that's the reason.

conspiracy theory angle, right? The conspiracy theory angle is this is all orchestrated by the government. And that the CIA was manipulating people's minds, trying to get society to unravel. And that they, but I, I, I only buy so much of it. Because I'm like, how do you make a guy as talented as Jim Morrison? How do you make the doors? If the CIA could make Jimi Hendrix, why don't they make more of them? Seems pretty awesome, like, why?

why wouldn't you?

maybe they have, maybe the modern day the the they learned that, like Lady Gaga will do, or whatever, maybe that's like the new thing. Maybe Lady Yeah,

Gaga, Lady Gaga's working for the CIA. There's probably somebody believes that there's probably some some theory about Lady Gaga.

everyone's a plant now, that's the Everyone. new thing, everyone's a plant. That's what they say. Anyone who's successful, they go plant for sure.

well, I go in the comments sometimes and I see all the people that they think are plants.

You're, you're a plant.

I'm, that's what they think. Yeah, it's kind of interesting

Are you?

that I'm not. It's interesting to me that I'm not like, it's interesting to me that no one has

They haven't.

tried to recruit me or pay me, or hire me, or influence me to do things. They don't need They definitely to. come on the show and say some things that aren't true, and I'm aware of that. And I feel like all I can do is like, hear their perspective, let the world make their own distinction. And I think people are pretty good at the these days. Like, this fuck, this guy, he's this, he's that, he's working for this guy, working for that guy.

But if you talk to enough people, they'll assume that you've been recruited. But the really fascinating thing is I haven't. That's what's really fascinating. The really fascinating thing is that no one has any influence over what goes on this show other than me,

maybe they have you and you don't even know it. Maybe you're under their spell. Joe. right? Like Maybe an Manchurian candidate they fucking

kinda thing.

they. They hacked your Instagram account, like, so now you're getting particular things into the feed, right? There's like, Yeah,

there's a fit.

would that be on? would that be crazy?

Well, it wouldn't be crazy, but that's not gonna work cause I barely go on Instagram, All right, that's not gonna work. And the Instagram stuff that I get to, it's almost like ancient history shit. And you know,

that's nice. bar fights, Sure, sure,

lot, a lot of assassinations, really, you see a lot of, like, uh, South American assassinations that, yeah,

like the presidential stuff.

well, no, uh, people just getting whacked in a diner or a pool hall. Someone comes in and just fucking blows some guy's brains out in front of everybody.

And then how do you feel after you put your phone down?

Not great. Well, that's one of the reasons why I try to stay off of it.

You, you're, you're ignoring your kids, going, Sorry, I gotta watch this. Uh, I gotta watch this guy getting shot in the fucking head.

No, I d. I try not to do it at home, uh, at home, You got I totally it, you get don't.

the only solution is just to get it and throw it in the fucking river, and we all just go back to. Kind of Well, I've just emailing.

been toying with the idea of moving away from a smartphone.

Have you seen this stuff about the T versus going? Insane?

They call it a dumb phone, right?

yeah, smart Samsung T vs. might use the mics of connected devices to listen to you.

They they they're definitely listening So people 100%. they

always think it's your phone listening,

have to.

but it's every other device around you listening and then sending it to an ad company.

yeah, that's the thing. Is like, there's there's terms of services, uh, like that you sign up for when you, uh, click, accept, and you don't even read those fucking things. And some of them, like the TikTok one, is insane. I don't know if it is insane now, but the old TikTok one was TikTok. If you had a phone and that phone had TikTok on it, TikTok was allowed to have access to the other computers that are on the network that don't have TikTok on them.

So you're essentially allowing whatever that program is, whatever the software is, to access passwords, keystrokes, your microphone, all kinds of wild shit. It's like some security expert looked at it and said it is one of the worst pieces of software I've ever read. this was Well, ever looked the these are the into.

new guys who bought it, and then they s, is it? No, this is before This is the old guys who, like, this is before, who was forced to sell it, and now it's owned the old Chinese by. Uh, guys or whatever.

yeah, now it's owned by the same people that own CNN, CBS, they, they, That's good, let they.

them own everything, let fucking give them everything. At this point, you'll you'll change the narrative if you just own all forms of conversation.

Well, it's gonna be interesting to see what they do with CNN, right? So all of a sudden, uh, these, uh, Israel supporters own CNN, so let's see what happens.

well, that's probably just a nail in the coffin for all this mainstream shit, right? Probably, You know, it's tough, it's tough to kind of people watch, people like, love that, like people will sit old, down. W the olds, The yeah, the boomers, you know,

the olds who are tired they'll go. And and their knees hurt.

and they're a little scared because they're old. And then this guy's telling them why they should be scared. Whatever it is, Fox News, CNN, it's the same talking points, it's the same bullshit, you know? And then they just, then they'll, they'll be like, breaking news coming up, and then they'll push some fucking pharmaceutical bullshit on you, you know, yeah, you got your it's not. But

two types of olds. You got the old boomers that are liberals that are basically like they have dried out brains, and they just they just support narratives, no matter what.

I don't really know any old liberals, to be honest. You don't. Oh, liberals I don't know.

are fascinating, cause they get violently angry when you confront them with facts, they get very angry. The whereas old conservatives are worried about, like immigration, they're but they, they're, worried about.

they're in a state of fear, though. Yeah, yeah, they're both It's like, fuck,

in a state of fear. Yeah, well, olds, a lot of the olds, they get in a state of fear cause they're dying, and they, and they know the end they is near, and they know their health is and they still not well.

think T V is truth, they they were raised on news is truth, and then they still have that.

yeah, and they take all TV channels their boosters.

they have now.

This is what they have now. Skydance Yeah,

is the name of the company.

yeah. So they have all the H B Os, M T V, Nickelodeon, Paramount Plus. Um, Nickelodeon yeah, they own Nickelodeon.

Yay, what do you think about Palestine? PBS, Smithsonian, Tnt, TNT, wow, Warner Brothers,

some of the top two

what are what are the other ones? Adult Swim? Wow, Cartoon Network, Comedy Central, All these cartoons is

TNT, BET. crazy.

that's crazy. Country Music channel, Wow, Food Network, Golf, cooking, they got on the golf and D C comics.

well, that's. There's also a golf channel Holy Fuck, that's on the same thing.

they own everything. That is great. Eurosport, that is discovery, that's crazy.

To be hon, I'd love, I'd love to own all that, to be honest,

What would you do? Animal planet?

I would sort of just, I don't know. I'd probably just like fuck with people who bullied me when I was younger or something. Just like, put out this, put out a random little news article every now and again about some guy having a little dick.

Ah, they own the free press, they own everything. It's a it's a strange time, but it's like the all that mainstream stuff, other than things like Paramount Plus and streaming networks that show shows. And and you know, things that people actually still watch. Most people are fucking tuned out to that. Young people are just like, you're not gonna get them, they're done.

it's, it's, yeah, it's. It'd be crazy to meet a a twenty year old who sits down and puts on a little bit of fucking C N N at night.

and really is invested. Yeah, and really, Interesting. Wow,

wow, did you?

I didn't even know. Yeah, it's like I didn't the most boring know.

shit, and it's it's like embarrassing. It's like things whizzing by the screen and shit like that. Coming up, breaking news coming up, like it's been been coming up forever.

Jimmy Carr was on the podcast yesterday. And one of the things that he brought up was that, uh, was it, was it his father that he was talking about? Who recognized that? When they started putting music on the news, yeah, so when they started putting music on the news, like, Oh, fuck, they're making it dun dun dun, da da dun, breaking news, yeah, they started dun dun taking them da da dun. behind some movie director, And then, yeah, and then it zooms in to fucking Anderson Cooper standing there with his glasses on, looking very intelligent, very professional.

standing in front Even

of a big, big screen T V. Yeah,

breaking news today.

we've got some bar charts that are that mean nothing, yeah, and you can sit there and go, Hm, I'm learning. And then. But a lot of people watch that shit too. And then you go, what did you just watch? And they go, Oh, I don't really know.

he's got upset.

They kinda just, yeah, they kinda just phase out with the headlines.

Well, no, it's the numbers are very low, which is really crazy that people are still willing to buy it. Like, I don't know why you wouldn't understand that that's a dying thing.

Yeah, well, once you also know that they have an obligation to the advertisers to kinda say certain things, then it's like the whole thing is a fraud.

well, there's a lot of the old liberals do not wanna believe that, and it's one of the things that They're not they're just

doing it for the good of like, it's their fucking health, they're doing it's a business, and your attention is the fucking money.

well, the best piece of evidence is that is they don't criticize pharmaceutical drug companies because they're they're a primary advertiser.

you think it's unethical for to do that to the

well, there's only two countries that even allow it, the United States and New Zealand.

what's going on over there?

I don't know. Apparently, they're much more restrictive, though, than us.

The key? W is, yeah,

But, uh, in the United States, they allow people like, how many fucking ads? If you watch regular television, do you see that are pharmaceutical drugs that are naming off a bunch of very obscure conditions that you've never even heard of? So why is there enough of a desire for this that you're gonna put an ad on television for a very obscure medication?

yeah, but if you, if you're It's sick and you need it, you should be able to find it. ask It shouldn't be your doctor, it shouldn't be impulse like, Oh, that's sounds like me, I should, I should try that. ask your doctor column Yeah,

about fuck it all. I think what's really going on, though, and you know, this has been, this is not my take. This is Callie Means and a lot of these other people that their position is that. Why they do that is not to advertise their drugs so people buy the drugs, they do that so that the networks won't criticize the pharmaceutical drug companies. So they advertise all their various products and it gets it out there. But more importantly, it protects them from the IRS, the Eye of Sauron, it protects them from the news.

Looking at cause. If their news really was the news, they would look into all the adverse drug deaths and all the different people that die because of these fucking drugs. That wind up getting pulled from the market because the FDA. didn't do their due diligence when they passed them. And

yeah, cause I'm I. But I remember we I was listening to some guy had a role in, um, you know, I guess, uh, big pharma regulations or whatever. And they were talking about Purdue Pharma and um, the the one of the things that was crazy was they. Uh, the guy asked him a question. He goes, Is Purdue Pharma, with all of their, uh, unethical techniques that they did to push that heroin essentially on, um, innocent people, why are they operating uniquely in the industry?

And they're like, no, every single pharmaceutical company follows the exact same way. The problem was is that Purdue Pharma and the OxyContin fucked up communities to such a degree that they couldn't get away with it. Whereas Xanax, you could argue, as a lot of people are addicted to Xanax, it's fucked up people. But it's not enough that people are tweaking and smashing fucking someone's head in at a liquor store for $20. So they're getting away with it, you know?

But it's the same lying. yeah, Xanax It's, yeah, is fucking it's the same

on it.

lying, it's the same bullshit, it's the same, like fucking, uh, doctored results, things like that.

Seen someone trying to get off Xanax?

No, actually, I haven't lived through that. No,

It is one of the hardest ones, apparently. I know a few people that have had it, but one of them real well, and Jordan Peterson, Jordan Peterson is a big one. Like Jordan, uh, he got addicted to Xanax, and it took him a full year.

is that why he disappeared for a while? Cause of his Xanax?

he had to go through some medical detox in Russia. Like, like, Why Russia? did they I don't know.

put him into a coma or something?

I don't know, maybe he doesn't really talk too much about it, but he seems different, you know? And I think there's a bunch of factors there why he seems different. He was very wise and interesting when I first, not that he's not still he's very wise, very interesting, very well read guy, but much more, um, damaged now. And whether that is because of health, I think it's also the pressure that comes with fame. I mean, he was a forty something year old professor in Toronto, you know, who's a psychologist.

He was, he's not a guy who was seeking out fame, this kind of attention and fame. And then all of a sudden he's doing lectures in front of tens of thousands of people all over the world, like traveling everywhere, doing these sold out lectures where he's talking about all kinds of different, interesting things. And it showed that people have a hunger for fascinating topics and deep discussions and conversations, cause his his lectures are very, very popular.

But I think over time, like some of his outbursts, and like, he's like, you know, yelled at people online, all these different things. I think some of that is just the pressure. Most people don't have any idea what that pressure's like. And then you all of a sudden get in it when you're in your forties and you were never seeking it, and then everywhere you go, you people are misrepresenting who you are. And trying to make it seem as if you're some evil right wing, racist, xenophobic, you know, uh, transphobic, homophobic ideologue,

It would be exhausting to have to live your life where every single thing is a take that is like a fucking controversial argument with people. Every cause, ev everywhere he lives, eh? eh? You know, in conversation is a difficulty. It's not, it's not a very simple, eh? You know, let's all have ice cream and watch fucking. NBA. It's something about surgeons should be fucking losing their license for for operating on trans people or whatever, you know?

And that's like just a difficult. It's a real heavy life to be in that conversation all the time.

all the time. Yeah, that's one of the benefits of doing a podcast, especially if you're a comic. Like, I could have a guy on one day that talks about that stuff, and then the next guy on, he, you know, met Bigfoot. Yeah, yeah, tell me Do you have a? Is that a bigfoot T

is it Sasquatch?

shirt?

Fucking sure. I went to Mount Rushmore. I, I bet I'm the ultimate tourist, I'll do it all. I love it. I love going to fucking bookies and and getting a photo with the mascot. I went to Mount Rushmore. I did a sh, um, one of the best trips of my life last summer. I I r. I heard about how beautiful Montana is and everything, and so I fucking worked with my agent to get. Like, we went Montana, North Dakota, South Dakota, Idaho, which is probably the most beautiful place in fucking America.

pretty gorgeous up there.

All up there. And now I've got the book, so we went everywhere. But over there, which is like, I think Rapid City is the closest to Rapid City is nice. But then they've got, like, the Black Mountains, um, out there, the Black Forest Mountains, it's just beautiful out there, beautiful. So that's all I wanna do now.

Is there supposedly bigfoot sightings near Mount Rushmore?

I don't think there. Oh, is, that's the funny thing about it. I think I just. It was the the only thing that didn't say, like, I heart fucking Mount Rushmore. So I wanted a shirt, and I was like, this will kind of do a Sasquatch type of a Mount Rushmore shirt. But

That's a special kind of person, the person who really loves Bigfoot.

I'd love to go to these places and do a little hunting.

Duncan and I did it.

You went looking for the guy?

Yeah, Duncan Trussell and I. I had a show back in 2011 or twelve called Joe Rogan Questions Everything. And one of the things we we were like, let's do a deep dive on S chemtrails, let's do a deep dive on UFos, let's do a deep dive. And so we did a deep dive on, uh, bigfoot hunters. So we went and met people that met Bigfoot. We took a lot of it is in the Pacific Northwest.

yeah, that's the hot, that's the hot button.

Yeah, also, a lot of meth, a lot of meth, a lot of Sasquatch, a lot of heroin, a lot of Sasquatch.

There is a card.

Are these the bigfoot sightings?

Yeah, look where the big clump is here. Oh, so, Texas, so

close to the pod.

is that? is that where the moonshine's made?

I have no idea, I just popped Well, it up because I was gonna is there any see where.

near Austin? There's bigfoot sightings in Austin.

yeah, there's f at least four, one down in Well, are you sure Wyoming.

those aren't meds, care with a wig on?

Let's see what it says. When was that Airman encounters nighttime encounter on Burcham Air Force Base.

in eighty one? On an Air Force Oh, that's base? He might

a long time ago.

be, uh, yeah, he might be an alien

Uh, September twenty, thirteen man has afternoon sighting of large bipedal creature.

afternoon sighting. Man, we're sitting there drinking moonshine. I was a little bit of hair. Fella, come over to me, wants me to suck his dick. I'm like, I'm not gonna do it, I'm not gonna do it.

1980, while two go sh shoot target practice, two men see upright hair covered figure. Homeless guy Yeah, it's a guy

could be anything. in the It was a nineteen in a guy eighty.

with a fur jacket on.

There was no homeless people in the eighties. Is that what you're There's saying?

barely anybody here back then. This is a ghost town.

But is so is the UM Northwest up in Washington? Is that much? Is that more busy well, there's on this?

a lot of bears up there, and bears walk upright. They do it all the time, and I think that's a lot of it. Also, the way it look. The one of the things that one of the first things that Duncan and I noticed when we went up there is that when you're in the Pacific Northwest, the trees are so dense cause it rains so much. It's like a box of Q-tips, like you can't see, you can't see through the trees, like there's so many trees.

It's like

and you just sort of see a shadow.

you see a shadow, you see a thing moving, and then in your head, your head starts spinning. Like, I was in, Uh, Alberta once, and for like, a second, I thought I saw a wolf and it was a squirrel, it was a squirrel moving through the woods. And I saw the gray and I think I was like, what was a fucking squirrel? Like, what's wrong with me? But my mind had convinced me for a very short amount of time that it was a wolf.

definitely. And I was like, you silly bitch, Where was this Alberta?

Alberta? Nice?

Yeah, very dense again, very dense. We did see a wolf up there, I'm pretty sure. He was either a wolf or a big coyote, but it was at dusk and it was running across the road. But they have wolves up there, my friends John and Jen, they run a bear hunting operation up there. And they they send me photos of wolves all they just sent me a photo of a wolf, uh, that were over a trail cam today.

wow, that's all. That's like kind of all I wanna do right now. I'm I'm organizing like a a hike in the Thoroughfare, do you know that in South Yellowstone? It's Oh, you like,

wanna go to the woods,

Uh, it's, it's not even the woods, it's, uh, just like open, uh, rolling hills in, like South Yellowstone, near the lake. It's called the Thoroughfare, and then you walk to the middle of it, it's forty miles in any direction from a road. And, uh, it's grizzly country, wolf country, elk, some moose, I believe.

you wanna go in there?

Yeah, that's all I wanna do.

Why? why do you wanna do that?

Because I I just started solo hiking and it's like my favorite thing in the world.

So do you get like a big backpack I get a with all your food big yeah, and a tent and that and the whole deal?

and then it's the most I don't, I've. I can't even explain it, but it's like a therapeutically. You pack up all your shit, you have no distractions, you make your food, and then you just all your goal is just march.

by yourself.

Yeah, and well, you'll meet people, you'll say, hello. I've never done like the thoroughfares, like that's as wild, but I'm, I'm definitely gonna do it.

But you've done s the solo camping where I've done you just put the solo the backpack on. stuff. Yeah, yeah, How far deep into the mountains did you go?

oh, I've never gone too crazy. I've gone like along the Appalachian Trail and things like that, so you don't see people. Um,

but the trail is at least is a documented it is a trail, you know, to documented trail. You'll keep moving.

have, you'll have, uh, designated campsites, and then there's all like bear safety stuff where you're not allowed to cook, where you sleep, and you have the bear hangs and things like that. So I'm excited. You, you, you're worried about me,

n I'm a little worried about you. Yeah, like, but don't. Do you bring an inreach or anything? Do and you know what that is?

yeah, like a garmin. Satellite? Yeah, Yeah, yeah, I, I gotta buy a garmin, or is that how you say I'm not gonna buy one? A good, expensive one, I gotta get the bear spray, things like that. And then I. It seems like people do it all the time. I've watched vlog so many just vlogs of people walking around these areas. And as long as you're not stupid and safe and and so and they they get cool videos, they're woken up by the elk fucking bugling in the morning.

All this type of stuff. That's all I wanna do is just I don't have any kids yet, so I'm kind of hoping to get this out of the way before it seems a little too responsible, irresponsible.

yes, yeah yeah. If you're gonna do the solo hiking, get eaten by a wolf, do it now.

But the thoroughfare is definitely my my goal. That's what I wanna do. It's eight days, you have to pack all your shit with you and you just head out, you just head out. But something about that when I'm marching on those, after about twenty minutes, I just, I don't know. I get into this weird fucking head space where I'm just like, March, march, march, and that's all I'm thinking. I'm just empty, empty head. I think I got too many fucking thoughts going on in there.

I think everybody does. Yeah, well, I also think that there's something about being in the woods that's very therapeutic. N just naturally, because that's our, that's our na. That's the natural environment where human beings are supposed to be, we're supposed to be in nature. We are a part of nature, and we're disconnected by nature by being in cities. And I think there's a little bit of anxiety and weirdness that comes with that, and that it goes away when you're out in the woods.

it definitely goes away. And the I think the simplicity of life is like your phone, you don't have signal, so it doesn't really matter. You have your map out. I'd love to even go a step further and have, like, a fucking compass and a real map, and try to do like orienteering style. But I don't, I don't really have the

I have a bunch of friends who do solo hunts where they go in and hunt solo.

and where do they do this all over? Was

What's that?

that? eh? They do this everywhere?

Well, you know, you have to go to designated areas and you have to go to like places where you can get a tag. But there's a bunch of places where you can get what's called an over the counter tag. Or, you know, you put in for a draw, you know? So what it means is like, these, uh, biologists determine, like, say, if you're deer hunting, uh, the biologists determine there's x amount of deer in this area.

And to keep the population healthy, you should remove x amount. And so they they put out generally, uh, enough tags to be. It's most people aren't successful, so it's like they put out more tags, probably than they want animals killed.

so they'll give you like five tags, you can, I like, get no, you would five deer.

most likely you get one, I'll get you would get

you one.

one tag, but they put tags out for, you know, let's say it's it. So that there's the way, uh, public land works in America, there's, uh, certain areas that are restricted units where it takes a long time to get a tag. Like, if you wanna get like a Nevada elk tag, very hard to get, you might put in for twenty years and then you get one. So it's a tag of a lifetime. And if you get a M, like a Nevada elk tag is a big one because they have giant elk in Nevada.

That's a very famous P place to elk hunt. And so people will wait forever, they finally get that tag, and then they organize, they get some friends to help them, and then they'll go out and they'll, you know, pack in.

and and these are probably in the kind of mountainous regions of Nevada, where where the grass is out. like, uh, Yeah,

the Apache reservations in Nevada are famous for, uh, elk hunting, um, because it's like some of the best elk hunting territory in the world. And um, the way it works is, uh, the nations control it. So, um, reservations in our country, they're essentially have their own laws, and they they're not subject to the laws of the United States government. So they,

even with and they with animals, even with,

yeah, with everything. Yeah, well, it's it's crazy, like in Canada, they alongside everyone else, so in Canada, it's called Crown land, that's what public land is in Canada. And, uh, if you're on Crown land and you're a whitey like me or you, you, you know. You get a tag for a bear, or a tag for an elk, or a tag for a moose. They can do whatever they want, the indigenous people, they call them First Nation people.

When we were up there, we were fishing, right? And when you're fishing, you're allowed to catch one walleye a day. So we're on this dock and we're catching, but we're next to these natives and they're pulling in walleyes left and right and putting them in buckets. They can take catch as many as they want. They can use spotlights at night to shoot moose, so they blind this moose with a spotlight and boom, they shoot them off the top of trucks.

They

And they eat moose. have, yep, They eat moose

oh, moose are delicious.

good. Moose goods.

Oh, it's delicious.

I've never seen one. I wanna, I wanna see one so bad. I wanna go up to the Adirondacks and do some canoeing.

if you see a moose, the thing about a moose, as opposed to every other deer species, they will fucking kill you,

they're gonna go nuts.

they'll kill you, they they will stomp you to death.

I wanna see one from afar. I don't wanna get stomped to death by a moose. That's a yeah. The little too much.

females with their calves are the most dangerous. They're fucking dangerous, they they're huge. You don't realize how big they are until you're with them. You're like, Oh my god, I only went moose hunting once, and that was in B. C. And, uh, it is wild. When you see one in real life, you can't believe how big they are. They're so big, they're enormous, and they will fucking kill you, like they'll kill you, cause they have to defend themselves.

They're around bears and wolves, they're used to stomping things, and they weigh 1,800 pounds.

And they're probably they kind of waddle in the water a little, right? So you're

They go in the water, if you're canoeing, they'll they're, just fucking roll well, they won't come after you if you're in a canoe. No, they'll come after you if on the l. Like, if you're on the land and they feel like you're too close, or you and these might be a problem.

guys are fast, too, are they?

Oh, they're faster than that, Oh my god, they're faster than you and me, that's for fuck sure. They have four legs and big muscles. Yeah, they f they'll fuck you I kinda up,

that's the way I wanna go. I get stomped wanna

by a moose. something. Yeah,

Getting stomped by a wild animal, standing on a snake while you're on a hike, that's how something like you wanna go, that, kinda tragically hilarious, yeah. that's a serious And everybody makes thing. fun of me on a podcast, going, look at that fucking idiot. Colum tried to get a fucking selfie with a moose and he fucking got the antler in the back of the head.

Have you ever seen that, uh, Instagram page Taurons of Yellowstone? Oh,

is this just fat idiots getting ran over by a bison? bisons Love it, sending people flying through did you?

the air.

Yeah, there was a video last year of this old guy, some old geezer, and the bison fucking hit him, and he fucking he. He did, he did a huge, and he, he got up, brushed himself off, and fucking he was good. But it was unlucky, cause the I think the bison chased a car that drove by, and then when the car moved away, they were right there. So they they were doing their distance right, and then they were running around a tree like fucking, uh, three stooges, trying to get away.

And then he just caught one and he went, oh God, and it's like a viral photo of him just being thrown huge in the sky.

there's so many people that want selfies with those animals, That was it's so strange. crazy. And to this day, people, the there's something about. I wonder how many people have died from selfies,

Yeah, it's kinda fine, though, it's kind of a, it's kinda, it's kinda. There's a lot of traffic. And if you if you're on a cliff getting a s selfie and you tumble down, it's kind of okay to me. Or if you, or if a fucking elephant fucking It's tragic, but it's it's tragic, sure,

it's understandable, and especially young people.

but not all deaths have to be tragic, do they? For fuck's sake.

Well, we're all gonna die, and some let deaths are learning experiences for the people that survive, which is the it's never happened to Taurons of Yellowstone.

me, it's not happened to me.

Not yet.

That's that's the New York mentality. When someone gets pushed in front of a train, Alright, we all kind of go, that wasn't me.

well, it happens infrequently enough that you're not nervous about it, but you know, it's a possibility. I, You don't stand right there and like, peek out

I just don't think, yeah, I just don't think that would happen to me. I don't know why. I just have this confident feeling that someone's not gonna shove me in front of a fucking train. really, Someone that I just think in my, uh, they they know better,

they know better. they, yeah, they Well, they probably try to do vulnerable people, they. F little Asian but

ladies, you know, probably that would be the that would be the easiest.

how many people every year get pushed in front of a train?

I think one or two. It's like a big news story usually. I if, even if, even that much, yeah, but you know, I, I've never gone hunting, I'm I'm organizing a hunting trip. My cousin, he's a hunter in Ireland, just started, he's a YouTuber now, actually, he makes these great videos. No, hunting, yeah, he hunts in Ireland, he hunts there in the Slieve Bloom mountains. Huge. B Uh, beautiful, like they're more like Irish mountains or hills, by the way, but they're beautiful.

So he's a YouTuber now. Call Horone if anyone wants to go check out. This is, uh, shout out to my little co cousin, Twenty but, uh,

to twenty five people are pushed onto the tracks per year.

okay, but they push onto the tracks.

It's just the New York subway.

yeah, not necessarily people struck or killed by a train. Some victims escape before the train arrives. December twenty four, twenty four, Brooklyn case. The victim climbed back onto the platform seconds before an incoming train. Fuck.

See, that's what I would do.

What if you're old and you can't pull yourself up? And you realize, like, you're just gonna sit there until that train turns you into a jelly?

Also, there's a count on. Selfie deaths. It's, uh,

Let's guess, let's guess how many people per year die by selfie. Globally, are we four Yeah,

hundred? I say, 2,000, Yeah, I think you're right, I fucked up. 2,000, Let me go again. cause okay, 2,000 wait a minute, and ten,

2010. Okay, you say 2010, I'll say 1,700. okay, all I'll go low, right, all right,

way too, way too high.

way too high. really.

Yeah, I mean, this is, uh, just reported. So it's 425 deaths linked over forty nine countries. I would have to say since 2011 or so.

But how many of them get reported?

That's what it said.

Like, if a guy falls off a mountain, how do you know how so it's he fell? a it's Well, did you a guess,

ever, well, you ever see that? too. do you ever see that? Uh, the fellow who got caught killing his wife? They, uh, I think it was India, maybe I'm wrong, but the they were getting photos and he kept kind of go a little further. But he didn't realize people were on another cliff could see it. And then, like, he ran over to him to shove them off the fucking bank.

And people were watching.

People are watching from afar, they saw him fucking shove him. He almost got away with it. Cause then he, but like, then he would have to come down and be like, Oh, she wanted a photo,

Oscar, look at this. Oscar, uh, Otero Aguilar, died accidentally shooting himself while posing for a selfie with a loaded handgun. Yeah, That's happened a few don't. times more recently, too, That's in Mexico City, Taj Mahal, India. A disputed example. Japanese tourist, Hajito Ueda, was widely reported of died falling on stairs while taking a selfie at the monument's Royal Gate. An eyewitness described a selfie related fall, but a police official told AFP the postmortem found a heart attack.

Okay,

right? But if I fall off a cliff, cause I'm taking a selfie, it's the fucking head wound that kills me, but the selfie didn't kill me. So that's kind of this, it's the selfie led to the heart attack. No,

maybe, maybe.

and this isn't gonna evolve into being caught while live streaming.

Maybe. He had a heart attack when he realized he was falling down the stairs and he's sixty six years old, and he realized, Oh my god, I'm gonna die, so he had a heart attack. That's possible, too, cause you do freak out when you realize, like, Oh my god, I might die soon. And then your heart's like, check, please.

I'm about to die right now.

Well, that means he's probably on the way to, but dying anyway. That's what killed him. Just a little bit of a freak out from falling down a flight of stairs, you know, work on your core strength, sir.

have you ever thought you were gonna die? Have you ever, like, really were like, Oh,

I've. I was in an accident when I was, uh, fourteen, not an accident with a car. We were, uh, hanging out in this, um, it was like this place that had these, uh, giant sewer pipes, like these huge cement sewer pipes. And there was this crane, this attachment that would lift up the pipes, like it would slide into the pipes and they would put it on a crane to lift them up. And we were fucking around and something happened and we were climbing on this thing and it fell.

And it hit me on the head, it hit me in the back of the head. I still have a scar on the back of my head, and, um, it hit me so hard that my consciousness grayed out and I survived, but I thought I was dying. I was convinced I was dying, and I was fourteen, and I had to go to the hospital. Just blood everywhere. I still have this gash.

how do they? How do they deal with it? Back then? They just sort of say, Hey, toughen up, Well, they like,

said, you're okay, you're not dead.

Yeah, that's how they just dealt with it in the eighties or whatever it was.

I don't even know if I got stitches, cause I have. It's a pretty significant scar. It's like, right here, right in the. But if I was here instead of here, I'd be dead. So it grazed my head, it like this thing dinged the back of my head and could have easily crushed my skull. I mean, it was this huge metal thing that they used to pick up these, uh, these huge cement tubes, and, uh, it, it banged my head and I thought I was dead.

I did, I thought, I thought it was going like it hit me so hard and it was so big and the pain was so extreme. And I didn't go unconscious, but I got real close, like, like, like this, like,

you're a rock, for sure.

like, where consciousness, like, and everything went grey. And I was like, s, and I was like, Oh my god, I'm gonna die, I'm gonna die. And my friends had to take me to the hospital. Yeah, it was very scary. I think my friends took me to my parents, my parents took me to the hospital. It's hard to remember it all cause it was so traumatic, but I I thought at that moment I was dead.

wow, you're like saying goodbye to everybody.

No, I was just like, Ah, I was just terrified, like I've never even done anything. Now I'm dead for being retarded, being a dumb kid.

I'm, I'm. I went to Laos years, I did. I traveled Southeast Asia when I was younger, then Thailand, Vietnam, Laos, Laos, as they sometimes people call it. But the it's the whole place there is built on, like a tubing economy, where they just you get in a tube and you float down a river from bar to bar. It's like this cool party thing. Everywhere you go, there's a DJ and each place has like a slide, each bar has a slide.

So you get in this tube at the start of the day. But they drive you up to the top of the mountain, you jump in the water, you flow. And then there's these little seven year old Thailand boys with a water bottle full of water on a fucking rope. And they're swinging it, and there's like six of them, and they're like swinging it. And then they'll, and they'll fly through the sky like fucking arrows from the fucking Indians flying, and they'll land, boom, right in your lap, and they'll fucking pull you in.

And you're flipping with, like a fucking euro or whatever it was that these like kids, cause that's their job. And I mean, they had a fucking accuracy, like insane. You wanna see talented people, like people in Thailand, Laos, Vietnam, cause they learn just one thing. Uh, since they're fucking can s stand, and it was incredible. But I was over, I don't know. One of these places had this, uh, a cliff you would jump off and then you'd land on this big inflatable like, um, cushion, I say, massive, like twenty feet wide.

And I jumped on it, fell off it and then wh, whatever happened to something, which is natural in the water, and I went down. Someone else jumped on it and the thing kind of rotated around. So then I came up, I'm just fucking trapped under this whole thing. And then I said, fuck, I swam and I tried to swim somewhere else, but it followed me up and then it fucking. I hit it again. So I'm just like, then I remember I started, I started to panic, and then I, I do remember specifically going, relax, don't panic.

And I swam down and I just swam, and apparently I swam for like, fucking so far. And then I came up like, and everyone was worried about me, everyone was fucking crazy.

holy fuck.

Yeah, cause people died down there, I think they kinda shut that down. That used to be like the coolest. That was like the last fun Southeast Asia thing where white people could die. And it wa, it didn't matter, it just sort of didn't matter. It's like, Yeah, welcome to fucking Vietnam, baby, you're gonna die here, but it's so much fun.

Well, before the internet, people would die and it would only be a local story.

Great. What a nice time to not have to hear about every fucking person that goes through a

That's true. trouble. That's a big problem with society today is that we are inundated by the bad news of the whole world. So 8 billion people worth of bad news.

and then the visual stuff of the amount of people I've seen die is is is off the charts, yeah, crazy. And the amount of things I've experienced through these fucking screens that should not, you know?

right, versus what you've actually seen in real life. Yeah, it's a big, it's a big problem, and it's a big problem. Desensitiz, desensitizing young people, like they used to think that, like video games, desensitized young people. And I'm sure they do. I'm sure. Like, being able to shoot a bunch of people in Call of Duty definitely does some kind of thing to your brain. It's an unusual thing. And people are spl blood splattering all over the place and you're like, fuck, yeah, you're having fun.

Um, but then when you're seeing it live all the time, like when I was a kid, until Faces of Death came out, the V. H. Do you know what that is? V H S tapes that came out in the nineteen? God, it gotta was, I wanna say, it's the nineteen eighties. They came out and it was a collection of videos of people dying. One of them was this guy, uh, they attached him to, I think they attached him to cars, like they tied his arms and legs and then pulled him apart.

And, uh, you, you see a bunch of things, the one of them, the famous one was Bud Dwyer, you know, from that song, Hey man, nice shot. Like that guy, he got caught in some corruption thing. I believe it was in Pennsylvania. I think it was, anyway, puts a forty four magnum in his mouth and just blows his brains out in front of everybody.

It's funny that whatever that scandal was back then, unpaid fucking parking tickets or some shit that was going to rock his whole life and embarrass the family. Is like, nowadays, it's like, you gotta be caught with a child on your fucking lap before you fucking admit it or retire or anything like that.

there's a meme that I just found the other day. Hold on a second.

But we we had rotten dot com, that was my generation's Oh, yeah, I remember version, rotten dot com. that. I remember being like eight years old and my cousins showing me a photo of a man with his hard dick in a fish's mouth. I remember it so young and they would load, so you would just, and you'd have to wait, and it would load. And you go, Is that a fish? and is that? And then it was just cock in his mouth, hard cock in this guy's mouth.

And they were like, What? Oh yeah, and then they'd show you another a suicide guy who would just everywhere.

Meanwhile, that's normal now.

That's so normal. There's like, there, look, there's like, there's these, like, I think society might be better with I got. No, it's like freedom versus fucking, you know, uh, the good, the good of society. But I think having a couple of walls in place for me to see a man with a cock in a fish would be good for people. I think it's I mean, just it's a constant battle of like, do we have speeding limits?

do we not? You know?

well, I think that's more extreme because it's it's shaping your mind. Like you're, you're getting access to information that formulates your worldview, and that that information is not necessary. Like, you maybe don't need to see a guy f mouth fuck a fish, you know, But at the same but mouth fucking a fish time, is so mild today, I, I know, that's what's nuts like today. That's like, we've seen so m, and it's desensitized people to an extreme level.

Like, I don't know how much of an effect it's had on how people behave, but it has to have a giant. It definitely hasn't had an effect on how people communicate online to each other. They're much shittier to each other than they were back then.

yeah, I think they call, maybe they realize that, you know, being online is kind of a there's a distance, you know? So it doesn't feel like you're really being human to You get that that. meme I sent you

Oh, no, sorry, I was reading about Budweiser. I did stuff I'd never heard. This guy, he was facing fifty five years. For what Uh, big scandal about some, he, I don't know,

I could? I could see the suicide rather than

fifty five hard years. the crazy. Well, He's also,

I mean, the part that's crazy is that he had this speech that no one knew he was gonna give. And it was like it had gone on for thirty minutes. And halfway through it, the press was getting ready to leave. And he says, some of yous are putting your cameras away. I think you ought to stay, cause we're not finished yet. And then

that's, that's a great way to he fucking pulled go.

out his envelope and did. thirty minutes, Yeah, I would

thirty minute speech, and then, well, I would've been happy it was over. sure. I well, I, Oh, I have the go ahead, I'm bad, I'm afraid sorry.

to shoot them myself.

What does it say? Uh, just go go down a little further down, down, down. Yeah, there we go. Uh. Dwyer alleged that his legal woes were political persecution due to his refus refusal to grant a travel voucher for Governor Dick Thurbrough's wife for a trip to Europe. Alleging that Thurnburgh said, uh, that he would get Dwyer, and that Thurnburgh referred to him as the fat fuck. Dwyer spoke out against the death penalty and expressed regret for voting in favor of it while he was in the Pennsylvania Assembly.

Speech lasted for nearly thirty minutes and then he blew his brains out. Whoa,

yeah, he faced fifty five years and a big fine, and, like his co-conspirator, got one year.

oh, someone threw him under the bus. Yeah,

I'm surprised there's not more suicides like that constantly, like a a big fucking show. I guess that's what it, uh, like a a mass shooting suicide thing is, but I mean, just a suicide. As like,

this is the meme. Politician 1996. I smoked pot once, but I didn't inhale. Politician 2026. I fucked a child, but I didn't eat it. That guy's fucking face, that guy's sweaty face. that's so funny, This is a fucked up meme.

that's so fun. Like growing up, when people said, I never, I didn't, I smoked, but I didn't inhale. As if that was like this weird, right. And then Obama what

was like, I did coke, and we're like, whoa,

did he say that? Awesome, good for him,

He definitely said he smoked weed, I mean, s there's pictures of him smoking weed. good, What were we just talking about just before that?

I don't know.

The Budweiser.

Oh, no, the was it the rotten dot com stuff?

And then, you know, you guys were getting into fish.

No No, but just much more recently, I had Suicide a point,

people doing a fan a fun suicide for everyone to see.

maybe that's it. I can't remember.

Big showcase.

I lost my thought, but I had a thought.

are these? Are these stars that you have? Cause they're, they're shooting by there. We Sometimes go. they shoot by, yeah, Are they? Is this like a replica of the of the actual night skies? Just is it just random?

just a bunch of random

You guys, we, we, me and a few comics last week went out the big bend, one of the most fun things we've ever done.

in Oregon?

We went. K Uh, no, uh, no, sorry, uh, no big

Where is that?

bend here. Oh, big bend, Big Bend National Park, it's South Texas, it's it's like the darkest region of oh, that's um,

the darkest region in South

one of the one of Texas. them, yeah, down there. So it's a designated night place, so all the lights go off. But we went out there. Yeah, that's exactly where we stayed at the Chisos Mountains.

Fuck, look how beautiful that It's fucking is.

insane how nice it is out there. And there was tarantulas walking around and shit, cause it's mating season. They came over and were climbing on our shit and Oh, mating stuff. Nah, it's so cool, season, it was fucking cool. But I look. So we sat out at night, the sunset would go down and we would watch the the the stars come out and we would sit there for seven hours, just staring at back, leaning back in our Tommy Bahama chairs.

We did a little LSD and then just looked at the stars all night. It was one of the most insane things I've ever done. But I've, I. After that, I feel like I'd I'd never seen the sky truly until I went out there. It was unrecognizable, you you couldn't pick out the big dipper or anything like that because there were so many stars, it was a mess.

yeah, isn't it beautiful?

It was so cool. It was the I. I. I would recommend everyone alive head out to Big Bend, look at the stars, do a little acid if you feel like it. Really think about fucking how insignificant you are. And my buddy Tim Butlerly, who's an amazing comedian, he's he's an Austin from Philly, he's one of the Philly boys. He brought his telescope with him, he has this huge big telescope, and we we searched. We were able to see Saturn, and you could see Saturn's rings, like, in detail through the telescope, and it truly was crazy

On acid?

on acid, looking at Saturn, and you're just going, What the fuck? Yeah, and it's quiet, it's quiet out there because people are camping all around you, but it's quiet. So, like, you'll hear someone from not far away, just in this tent, you know, in the middle of the night, some guy wacking off in the tent.

Wacking off in a tent is crazy. You You know, can go out there, stare at the stars on acid, but you're like, No one more night, I gotta get in

one more night. there, yeah,

Think I'm gonna go, you dated in high school.

but we, yeah, but that, that was. That's a cool place to go out there. It's not f. It's like eight hours from here, but

We are denied that image. Cities in as great as they are, they've fucked us in that we we have a disconnect with the universe now. You you used to be able to every night, you would see that in the sky,

that would be what I would do for entertainment. If that was the sky in New Jersey, I would sit out my backyard

of course.

and I would stare at that shit all night. And you, and at the at the beginning of the night, Saturn's there, and then you think I'll watch for another hour. And four, five hours later, you're just staring as this thing rotates and you can see the milky way, which I'd never seen before. There was like little clusters of shit that I'd never seen before. And you're just,

and the reason why you can't see it is all just light pollution. There was a a a time when, um, we went out to the Big Island to, uh, with my family, to the Keck Observatory. And this is, I've been there three times, this is what but I've, Hawaii. yeah, but I've only seen it really once. And, uh, the big island, you drive, you actually drive through the clouds. Like we as we were driving up to the observatory, we're like, Oh, fuck, it's cloudy out, we're not gonna see shit.

This sucks. Let's just keep going. But then, as you keep going up the mountain, you pop through the clouds and then you get to this observatory and the sky is magnificent. I caught it one night where there was no moon out, and that's what perfect, you want. Yeah, you want no moon, and the sky was just littered with stars. crazy, It seemed like we were on an organic spaceship, that's what it seemed like. It did not seem like we were on Earth.

It seemed like it was like a convertible spaceship, and we're flying through the universe. It was incredible.

And then you don't realize, then you go back to your city stars, and you're like, this

They're whack. sucks. Yeah, it's There's not enough,

not enough. It's just not enough. couple dots. It's It's not enough.

just it's weird, that weird trade off, but it's like that weird trade off has allowed us to do so much, but yet it has disconnected us from just our place in the universe. It's very humbling, and I think that humbling thing is very important. People just to put it all into perspective, to be able to see the stars and go, Wow, wow, what the fuck, man? And that's just all you can see. This is just one puny little galaxy that's, uh, eh, hundreds of billions of galaxies in an infinite universe.

I it. It can get a little thinking about it can get a little heavy, cause then you kinda start to go, why do we care about anything, you know?

Well, it's supposed to put it into perspective when you're looking at little, tiny, insignificant things that are freaking you out. You know, little weird things like, Oh, fucking, the guy at work is gonna fuck me, I'm not gonna get that promotion. And then you're all sort of like, Okay, this is a bigger picture. There is a way bigger picture than Safeway, where I work at, or whatever, you know,

yeah. Being upset that the next Netflix subscription's gone up or whatever, you're, you know, mad about

Whatever it is, it's bothering you. These goddamn liberals ruining the country. Star

So we, we had a funny moment. We were all lying out at this, the um, just decked out, looking at the stars, enjoying it. And we're we're quiet because it's late at night, it's two o'clock in the morning and just tents everywhere. But it's quiet as shit. And Mike Rainey, who's a comedian, he does dad meet podcast. He was like, Ah, I'm going to bed, guys, I'm off to bed. He gets into his tent and it's quiet, and I'm staring at, and you're thinking about, like, all of the previous humans that have looked at the same stars and that same thing.

And in the middle of just out of his tent, you just hear out of nowhere, just wow wow. It's fun to stay at the watch. And then you, ha, and I mean, that echoed through to us. It, why? and it just echoed through the fucking mountains. He had gotten into bed in whatever way, he opened up his phone, but there was no signal. One of the last things on his timeline was the fucking Y M C A song, which is when you excuse yourself from a bunch of boys, look at the stars and get into a tent.

And then the loudest, most embarrassing, gayest song of all time goes bellowing. And like we, there was people in other tents, we were crying, laughing so hard, cause we were trying not to laugh. But there was other peop we could hear other people's tents start to laugh,

That's hilarious.

cause we we laughed for twenty five minutes crying. And we're like, what the fuck, Mike? And he just, he never said anything, he was too embarrassed. And I'll, yeah,

Ah, that's hilarious.

one of the most fun trips ever.

That song isn't it weird that that song became a part of Trump's campaign? How odd, like, Well, I went to the inauguration. One of the weird things about the inauguration was that the Village People were performing at one of the after parties. What's left of they were the Village People?

there. Which one?

Yeah, I don't know, whatever

The cop?

ones are left.

What was he wearing?

The thing is like, you could have a new cop, you could have You could a new. Nobody knows easily. who anybody is.

Ah, there's some purists out there, would. There's a couple of, there's a couple of Village people people in fishing hats, you guys. I saw one. I, Yeah, I saw the Village people, the real Village people. the real ones I saw them at that prime. Yeah,

back in the seventies when they were all alive.

that's some fucking gay orgy thing going on. Yeah,

Yeah, it's fun to stay at it became the

the anthem of of. It's just a gay anthem, I it's. But guess, or, or, it also or,

became the anthem of the Trump administration. Like he would go out there and do a little dancing, like, what

yeah, I don't know.

young man? It's very weird, right?

Yeah, but see, see, is, um, Nicki Minaj's ass thing going on there? So Nicki Minaj is like a big Trump girl.

which is so odd. What do you think that's all about?

needs to sell C Ds or something, I don't know. Like, I don't get it. Why? Why the fuck would Nicki Minaj? Also, I'd be embarrassed to bring her out and go, Hey, look at this fucking. Remember Nicki Minaj, who used to rap about having a fat ass ten years ago? She thinks I'm cool. That's like a bizarre fucking. It's Well, like, embarrassing.

if you're a fan of his, he'll take you in.

But he brought her out and he's like, Nicki Minaj is great. She goes, he goes, She got a great ass. He said He goes, Yeah, that, he goes, can't miss that ass. He goes, show him, show him, Nikki, and Nikki got up and gave a little Nikki did a little fucking spin for the crowd and then, like, went up. my god, Chup, chup, chup.

oh my god.

He might be going for a third term with Nikki's ass fucking vice president.

Well, there's people that think there's some sort of a loophole. Bro, I gotta piss. Let's, uh, let's come back, come back, yeah, okay, great, come back, we're back, and we're back. Where were we? Y M C A Niki Minaj's ass. Let me see that. Can we see the video?

Pull up Nikki's ass, there.

Did you see that breakup letter he wrote to Bill Maher?

No, Trump did Trump. Turned the ladder.

It's a breakup letter. It's like, uh, a girl who got dumped, who's like, fuck him and he's always a loser and like that kind of thing. It's really crazy.

But Bill Maher was like, anti Trump, and then he fucking had dinner with him, and then he's A couple like, great guy.

times and had dinner with him recently, and then went on his show. And I guess he said some things about how Trump is losing support in the polls, or whatever it was. And Trump wrote this long fucking screed, this scroll that he put on Truth Social about, Uh, Bill Maher's a fucking loser. And he was like he was drunk at the White House, he needed a drink. Like, it's

it just, he, he, he is a gift that does not stop giving, even if you don't you don't want the gift, you know?

Well, there's. There seems to be 2 things. This doesn't have her in it, but this is definitely a quote. He said about her. Lizzo Lizzo Is is

I'm studying, and then I made the mistake. I told in fun. I said, I looked at his ass, and I've never done that with a man before. It's true off the record. Women, yes, men, no, okay. By the way, I looked at one hell of a beautiful ass before Nicki Minaj.

that is so crazy.

That's hard to miss. That's stand up. That's hard to miss.

it's hard to miss.

Is she showing her ass to Oh, she must everybody? be, I don't She's twerking or something

know camera. over there. That anaconda

Okay, I'm gonna get back to my story, Nick. I hope Nikki wasn't insulted, but we love Nikki.

love Nikki, though.

So crazy.

It's crazy that politicians used to be so straight laced or, like, organized.

And she's he's staring at her ass, she's up there talking,

in her custom fucking Louis Vuitton, that's

the crazy thing is, all politicians swear now. do they? Yeah, Yeah, they swear. That was unheard of. You never heard a president swear, but now they all swear. I don't, It's super common.

I don't like it. I like the idea of having a politician who's fucking Bullshit, kinda straight, yeah, full of shit, full of shit, I guess.

doesn't talk like a real Yeah, but you kinda human. like that kinda. Yeah, Dude

I. I. I think the guy in charge should be a little bit fucking. reserved. Yeah, Yeah, I don't want them fucking

under control.

writing letters to Bill Maher.

See, the letter pull up the letter to Bill Maher. It's crazy. Wait till you read it. It's fucking. so long,

The only files released are the

but I don't.

red letters.

I don't even think what Bill Maher said was that bad. I think the R the thing that got him was saying that Trump lost all of his support with the Republican Party. I think, and then he pulls up

he's lost a lot. his not He's not, he's, he's, according to him, according of course,

to him, there's a CNN poll that says, like, 98% of Republicans.

part of his magic, though. Yeah, you He

can find a poll here. It is

the polls are fake news.

let's talk about this complete and total loser, all caps. Bill Maher, let's talk about him. He got a low rated show on equally low rated HBO, which was once long ago a network of quality and excitement. But that's all gone. It's not hot all caps anymore! Exclamation point. Maher's friend and business associate, Chuck Lobella, was also a friend of mine, worked on the top hit show The Apprentice as a gopher. And because of the success of that show, number one and top rated on many weeks, with the finale being among the top shows of the year.

He was automatically and quickly brought up through the ranks of NBC, along with everyone else associated with the historic happening in all ca- in um quotes, rather, I don't know why happening is in quotes. The success of the apprentice was so great that everyone partook. It built many careers, and that is a wonderful thing. Some people, this is wordy. Some people say it even built my career because I became president. I would have won without it!

Exclamation point. In any event, over the last few years, Lobella would call me nonstop and say, Hello, be very nice and tell me how much Bill Maher loves and respects me. And would constantly ask of me, even before I was president, for any form of meeting with Maher. And would I do his show? When I became president, I agreed to meet after the 1st one and the last one, but never agreed to do his show, which he wants me to do desperately.

All caps, it won't happen! Exclamation point. When I've watched the show, which isn't often, it always ends with dishonesty about me, at least, but who cares? He doesn't think it was a good thing to take the nuclear weapon away from Iran, which shows you he's not very smart. If I allowed them to obtain a nuclear weapon, the world would be a different place right now! Exclamation point. Using fake polls, I like how he, like, capitalizes fake and polls.

He also said I had my lowest rating so far. Even the Republican Party doesn't like him in quotes, but that's not true. I have high ratings. And more importantly, he said that I'm losing the support and approval of the Republican Party. When, in fact, CNN just came out with a poll showing them I am at ninety eight and ninety nine percent rep support within the Republican Party, and all-time record high all, uh, capitalizes all capitalizes the T in time, the R in record, and the H in high, which I don't understand.

Ronald Reagan was at 86%. CNN's Harry Enten also said I am the most influential president of the last century. Is this after the Ellison's bought CNN? Okay,

Hbo, which is confusing why he's talking shit, but I mean, it's just

he's a he has a lot of time on his hands.

Uh, CNN did another poll, the most popular person in the history of the Republican Party, and I won that, too, with me being at 53%, Ronald Reagan being at 18%, and Abraham Lincoln being at 8%. This is crazy. And these CNN polls people not exactly in love with me, so Bill Maher lied, but his lie, but he lies about everything, and I believe he lied to me. When I asked him, with all the applause and laughter he gets after almost everything he says about things that aren't funny or even good, what laughter machine does he use?

Laughter and machine have capital L and a capital M. Uh, people can't You know what he think he's funny.

might? He might be right about that, though, cause You think there's he,

a laugh track?

it's not funny. I know that

Yeah, but people, like, love it, and they're there live and they get enthusiastic. it's the And have you ever been to a rhythm. live taping? Yeah, well, Like a live taping of a show? They have, like a p person that does this thing, it says applause, and they have, like, a producer with a headset on. It's like, applaud, applaud, applaud. Uh, okay, a laughter machine, um, about things that aren't funny or even good, what laughter machine does he use?

I don't know Bill, he didn't know me, and that was okay. I didn't know Bill, he didn't know me, and that was okay. Then Chuck Lobella and my friend Kid Rock called me incessantly about meeting with Bill Maher. My first response was, Fellas, this guy's a goofball. They said he wants to go down to the White House, be with you and talk. He said, You're smart, but you're not into the liberal platform. Will you start thinking about it?

He invited himself to the White House! Exclamation point. We had our 1st meeting. Bill was very nervous, he asked for a drink, he was very insecure, and he had a seriously bruised eye and nose area, as though somebody had just beaten him up, but it wasn't me. What? No sooner had we had that 1st dinner at the White House, which is very a very seductive and beautiful place, especially now that I've fully renovated and fixed it in the style which it deserves.

thank God.

Bill wanted to come back. Uh, the gopher called me many times, multiple times, saying how much he loves me and that he respects me more than anybody. And he wants to come back for a 2nd meeting. After ten calls from Chuck Lobella, it seemed that these guys were serious and wanted to learn more because their policies are so bad, it's ridiculous! Exclamation point. Also, I wanted to tell Bill that he has a that he's a major pothead.

All caps, he's gotta stop, it's very bad for his health. This is He's a guy, this spiraling. is a guy that's eating McDonald's He's he's all day.

walking around the room saying this to someone typing it out, and he's

100%.

just looking around. And another thing,

He looked like hell this time. Bill was drunk and had alcohol in his hand as he walked through the White House. Stephen A. Smith and Kid Rock came along with him. Overall, I thought it was a good meeting. It didn't last four hours, it lasted two hours, maybe less, and everybody was happy. We have the timestamps. I learned nothing and felt it was a waste of time. After the 1st dinner, Bill Maher was friendly, I guess everyone walked away pleased.

He gave me a good 1st show with a lot of laughing machine laughter and laughing machine and laughing in machine. The L and the M are are capitalized, which is a real term, uh, but it is what it is. And then he reverted back to his former self and his old ways. I understand that he's doing his thing. I never took it personally. I would always mock his low ratings whenever I heard he's not a nice guy and what he spouts isn't what he believes.

He has to cater to his base, which is mostly composed of losers, there's a capital L in losers and people who don't like working. It's why, for so long, I didn't get another call from Chuck Lobella, and I didn't miss him one bit. After the 2nd dinner, Bill's show, in quotes, was far worse than the 1st. He went crazy exclamation point. He's gutless because he enjoyed every minute. Also, I am not building a swimming pool in the White House briefing room and never had any intention of doing so.

I am thinking about moving the press and putting them in a different location, but I will use that location for very badly needed space. Bill also attacked our great Republican candidates when he knows my endorsement record is 98% in the House and 100% in the Senate. So how can he make a false statement like this? These statistics are facts, all caps, and he should speak about them, but he won't because he's very unfair.

Exclamation point. Caroline Leavitt was great. This is so this is worthy on the show. this B But he started a bi- uh, but he he started with a biased, dumb, sleaze bag, all caps, asking questions. She defended me and herself so well, but couldn't be comfortable going against lie after lie, capital L L in lies. Uh, importantly, Bill lied about all the illegal voters in the radical controlled, decrepit and devastated state of California. Just in K in the last few days alone, they found 20,000, and the number could easily go to over one million.

There are so many falsehoods Bill spewed, but I won't waste time in fact-checking all caps him. He isn't worth it. Bill, don't call me anymore, it's useless. And tell Chuck Lobella not to call so much and say how much you love Trump, all caps in quotes, and wanna get together. Because you're a hopeless guy who is just trying to cater to your small group of fans in quotes. You're also a coward who's afraid to tell the truth about how well our country is running because of your few fans in quotes, and how badly the D Democrats have done, almost destroying the USA.

If I hadn't won the election, it would be dead. All caps. Also, turn your laughing machine off.

brings it back.

It's a joke when they laugh uncontrollably, even when you said nothing funny. And I'm going to have have the Republicans not cover you anymore because they try to talk about you as a guy who is transformative. You're not transformative, you're a loser, capital L and loser. I never watched your show much, but I will never watch it again because it's nothing more than fake news, all caps that America and the world is unfortunately subjected to. Thank you for your attention to this matter, President Donald J.

Trump. It has 4,640 retreats at the time, I'm sure more now.

weird. The the like. There's gotta be just questions about how much time he has to write. That. Just such a minor m thing, and everyone's goes, but I think the people around him probably just go, Oh, he'll be distracted for a couple of hours. Let I think him go, let him work on he's his little blog, let him go work on his little blog. And just say we and we'll try to correct the decisions he made earlier today.

I think he gets very upset when people talk about the polls.

do you think the person writing it knows what to capitalize? Or I think he says has to? He has that, to go back I think he through and be like, says that. capitalize

He sucks.

that, capitalize that. Capitalize the L and lies, Nope, you didn't get losers, right?

capitalize losers.

he gets to the end. Did I mention the laughter track yet? Put fans in quotes, Maybe they didn't do it.

the laugh machine. I just don't know why. I mean, that's not something I would ever do. I don't understand.

he balances his time. Oddly, W Well, yeah, well, how mu- he must have a lot of time, cause did hasn't his like net worth, like, quadrupled in the last two years?

well, it's definitely gone up with the coin, right, the Trump coin, that But but was a big one.

but I think across the board, he's his, his money's going up, so he must have a lot of time to be president and also become, uh, five x his billions.

Well, I would imagine he has people doing that too, right? And that's probably why some of it is.

that's. That's the best thing about America is that, like a lot of countries, would probably have a. So that the most powerful man couldn't get the c grow that much in wealth. Well, it should But

be the case with the entire government that they shouldn't be able to profit off of it. His net worth has increased an estimated 2.7 billion to 4,100,000,000 since winning the 2024 presidential election, bringing his total net worth to roughly 6.4 billion. That's a lie. It's more than that. see, See, I don't know what that is. Um, how much of it is stuff that I would disagree with, right?

So the the the meme coin's crazy, the meme coin, it was like like,

a pump and dump, essentially, wasn't Yeah, well, it? A rug pull

they all are.

and all that? Crap? D Well, Hunter Biden Yeah,

just did one of those, they all do. I mean, if you're gonna put out a fucking meme coin that, I mean, they're almost all pump and dumps. And even if they're not like whoever's putting money into it, they're pumping it up. And with the I idea that it's gonna hit a peak and they gotta know when to bail. It's like everyone's doing that, it's a Ponzi scheme. yeah, and and Yeah,

the president did it, and

it's also, I think, it's a way to launder money. Um, so, like, is that better? Or so, like, so, this is one of the things that Hunter Biden was accused of with his, his artwork, and so he was selling his, and I use artwork in quotes, like Trump would use it. His artwork was selling for like half $1 million for a painting. And you look at the painting, like, what the fuck is that? This is who the fuck is paying a half $1 million for this?

If you wanted to give someone money, but you couldn't just legally give them money. What you could do was say, why don't you draw a picture

draw me a piece of shit, and I'll buy huh? Yeah,

that picture, and that's all you have to do. And it's the same thing like with a meme coin. So let's let's say, uh, we're gonna do a Colum coin, right? just do it, let's Let's do it, launch it, let's let's go,

do it.

we're gonna launch it right That's unofficial, now. Someone by the way, will probably do it, they'll probably do it. I'm gonna go, There's millions

I'm. I have to. Well, of those you know, I have to things. go buy it now.

Yeah, there you go, buy FU Colum coin. So if you wanted to do that, the way those coins work is there's an initial investment that that goes in. So you get a bunch of people to to invest actual real money in this coin, right? And then there's a bunch of people buy into the coin, so they buy the coin. So if you're a person that, uh, like, if I wanted to bribe you, right? And I said, Uh, listen, what?

What we're gonna do is we're gonna start this meme coin. And, uh, my country is gonna put in $300 million into this meme coin, and this country's gonna put in X, and it's gonna put it. And and then, you know, once it gets to a certain level, we're we'll pull out. You'll get, you're gonna be worth billions. And then you say yes to that. And whether you're Hunter Biden or whether you're Trump, or a wide variety of people have done these things.

This the hocktua lady did it right, she had one, and I think she, she legitimately, I think, was unsophisticated and didn't really know what was going on. They rug pulled her, but I think I don't know. Well, I'm just being nice, um, but the you're being the

nice by calling her a stupid idiot.

well, a young kid, she's fucking Yeah, I get twenty years it. I also old.

I think so, I actually I would, I agree.

would have been completely retarded if She's not around that.

anymore, so that's kind of

She is around. is she? I thought Yeah,

she, I thought she, like, went back to working in fucking Wendy's she's on Instagram, or whatever. Is she? she's, yeah, she's still Oh, she's

out there.

still, she's still spitting on that thing. She don't spit like she used to now that she's rich. silk sheets and the Nah, whole deal but these bitches get rich and they stop spitting.

stops spitting. It's a great They're more sophisticated distinction, now.

you know?

Yeah, you got caviar in your teeth. But the point is, you could put a bunch of money into a meme coin. That person gets the meme coins and then pulls that money out, and then that's legal. You see what I'm saying, and so that's a way to give someone money.

it's all legal, and we all just kind of tolerate it, I guess. And

Well, it's weird. The the whole meme coin market is weird. Like, who's who's running out the door to put all their life savings into the Melania coin? It's an odd, it's an odd thing.

the guys, you know, that's us.

Ah, guys, you know, they're like, there's a way. Somebody made money, some people made money, and clearly he made money. Like, what does it say? Trump made his money from cryptocurrency? Fake money?

Why can't you? Why can't you be president and and earn $2 billion on the side? A little a little passive income. Well, the weird thing Why can't you?

is the it's legal. This is the thing, so he's done nothing Great, wrong in terms of the eye of the law. This is the fact. but then the And he is a businessman.

i in the eye of society, we kind of understand that this is a kind of a conflict of interests, right?

for sure, not, uh, not something that looks good to the average person that this guy's making billions of dollars from being in the idea. The the the what we would hope, this is the thing that we the the goal that we would strive for is to have someone who's a president. And what they really want only is for the good of the American people.

that person would be shot early on. Like, sorry, that's not, that's not what this is. Sorry,

They don't want that person to don't or be making that, billions while they're in office. but, you know, also, Is that

that person will run on honesty. They'll lose an election, and then next election, they'll they'll lie through their fucking teeth because they go, I lost it on honesty before, now I'm corrupt. You'll get voted out if you turn around and go, Hey, everything sucks, and it's gonna suck for a long time.

Here's a interesting stuff that we just found out here.

it? Says Trump making money from crypto is not automatically illegal, even while president. Yeah, but particular details could be unlawful if they involve bribery or prohibited benefits from foreign governments, Alright, so we're He kinda, he gonna go up there

lives in that space, though, where

and speak out.

is that legal?

right? So, is now a concrete legal challenge. October twenty second, 2026 federal civil lawsuit alleges that Trump unlawfully benefited from two UAE-linked world Liberty financial transactions. 500 million dollar purchase of 49% stake by an entity backed by UAE National Security Adviser Sheikh. Tachnun Bin Zayed Al Nahang. How do you say that? Nah

I couldn't do that. Nahyan, Uh, two Yeah,

billion dollar purchase of World Liberty USd one stable coin by an Abu Dhabi investment fund, chaired by Tachnun. Uh, the transaction amount is not the same as Trump's personal profit. Lawsuit alleges unconstitutional foreign emoluments emoluments. Yeah, yeah, emoluments, and seeks discourse, uh, disclosure, rather, and return of allegedly unla- unlawful profits. So what is? It's unlawful that the Abu Dhabi? Sheikh put bought into it. Is that what's unlawful?

I believe so, foreign entity.

you know, I'm just trying to stick to stand-up.

Including main financial conflict provision? That means a financial interest that would require an extraordinary executive branch official to step aside does not automatically create the same statutory violation for the president. That exemption is written to law. It isn't unique to Trump, but it's not a blanket exemption from anti-corruption law or the Constitution. Okay, look at the whole fucking crypto world is weird. They tried to get us to do a crypto coin. They they contacte

Joe coin.

me, and what? They were a Jerry coin or something like. Fuck off, like, what are you talking about? That's not real money. Like, what are we doing here? But it's a loophole, it's a loophole, and this, this, this is, this is the thing. Like, if it's legal, like, would if you can do it. And you're a businessman, you're guy who, like, that's your whole thing, make, make, make as much money as make money. Yeah, possible. It's clearly a big part of his whole thing is to make a ton of money and you can make the money.

And he's like, I'm still doing great for the country. Just get a little for myself on the side. I don't know.

I think we've had our fill of Trump, though. Trump was a lot of fun, and now it's kinda just it's, it's. It's my whole time living here has been pretty much just dominated by Trump. And I feel like it's like things need to Well, I think mix things up a little.

things like that letter to Bill Maher are not the best, like, that's, that's not a good look.

One of the worst things he's ever done. That's the worst thing I've I've seen. Yeah, I got out of it, though. I got sucked in, remember, with the Iran fucking, uh, war and invasion, or whatever way you wanna call it. And I was like, listening to fucking just too much, like Frontex and Dave Smith all day, and I'm. I just had to kinda just turn my phone off one day and went fucking out into the woods and stuff.

But then there's two arguments, right? If you turn turn your phone off and don't pay attention, then all the craziness just keeps going on and your life eventually gets affected by it. Cause they start bombing us. Like, you know that, maybe it's better to pay attention and to just keep your eye on whatever the fuck is boiling I'll, I'll, in DC.

uh, when there's bombs dropping, I'll fucking put on a little Frontex and find out what's going on.

Well, a lot of people are worried that after the midterms, so when the midterms are over, that that's when they're gonna start doing more shit in Iran. That this isn't done yet.

have I drank all that on you? I don't know, but bro. Um, but

but there's a lot of people that believe that that it's all gonna start popping off again in Iran, cause it's like it's not resolved. I mean, they have to have people

yeah, real blunder, real disaster of not a situation. good, It doesn't look good. not good, It's actually kind

not good.

of, kind of pathetic, actually, honestly, on a world scale, doesn't look good for America to not be able to just wipe out fucking country.

Well, it's not just that, it just doesn't seem like it was something that was it's it. Every other president was the attempt to talk them into doing this. They tried to talk Obama into doing it, they tried to talk Biden into doing it. Nobody did it.

who's there?

Whoever wants us to bomb Iran, that might live in Israel.

Not saying anything. It could be, it could be them, it could've been the Swedes, it could be anyone.

Well, the it could have been the Russians. That's a that's a fun one. They always like to blame everything on the Russians. Yeah, so, um, you know, like this. The thing that disappoints everybody who supported Trump before he got into office was one of his big things that everybody agreed with was no more war. Like, please, that sounds great, no more war.

it'd be great.

Because we keep thinking, like, why are we involved in these unnecessary wars? Because we always assume there's so much money involved in politics, because the military industrial complex has a huge amount of cash. They influence politicians, they influence policy, they need more wars so they could sell more weapons.

Yeah, yeah, it's like, that's like. This is the feeling of exhaustion where it's like, I'm gonna turn this off. I'm gonna go to Alaska, I'm gonna see some fucking bears. I'm going, I'm doing weekend shows in Anchorage, and I'm hoping to go to, uh, Katmai National Park, you know it, where the bears, like, catch the salmon coming out of the fucking. I'm going in September, so, like, the it's a little different, but

is it past the salmon run by then?

it's over. So they, they, they go to a different section, they're not jumping out and they're catching them out, but they still catch the salmon at a different section. So I'm hoping to go out there and camp overnight. But they you camp in a in like a fenced off electric, uh, gate type of thing, but you camp out there. Have you ever been over there to do any of I've been that?

to Anchorage, Ari and I went over there We and we went salmon did, fishing. Yeah, we went salmon, we we had a two-day thing. Guides. Yeah, that's nuts.

so I got a I got a trip. I'm doing a bunch of shows, uh, columterior dot com for all my tickets. Uh, check out the special, by the way. Sorry just to interrupt, but a new special right now on YouTube called Bells and Whistles. Please check it out, leave a comment if you like s. Anyway, back to the grizzly bears. Yeah, this is what I'm gonna go do and take photos of bears. Um, but it's like, it it.

There's a limited amount of spaces, so they have like cabins, but the cabins are like $700 a night or something. Or you can cam sit in a tent with the bears for $12 a night, and I don't know, I'll, I'll do that.

well, that's the more authentic experience, you know, be behind a door,

but these bears are so well fed that they they've no interest in. I just watched a thing about the lions in fucking, is it Botswana? Do you know the guy on Instagram, Grizzly guy or Grizzly guy? And he has this, he co. He does these shows, I think they're called E- Endless Venture. Yeah, and he goes all over the world. He just, he just did a thing in, um, in the, uh, the tundra up in fucking Alaska, where it was like twenty four-hour sunlight.

And they went looking for grizzly bears, or, sorry, polar bears, real fascinating stuff. But they went on a trip to Botswana, and the lions there are so well fed that the lions won't attack you as a human. So they had this cool, Yeah, th- this guy's fucking awesome. I love this fella. Um,

he's just hanging out with lions.

and they'll so they'll sit down and they get into a decent, like non-threatening position, and they put out like a call, like an injured bird or something. And then this pack of lion, you see the lions just slowly spread out, and they all follow the main fucking leader, and then they. He gets right up to them, and then they see them and they stare at each other, and everyone's quiet, and they stare for like five minutes.

And then the lion goes and just sort of plops down, and they're just sitting there, surrounded by a pride of fucking lions. In the middle of, uh, this delta, whatever it's called, the Ok Okavango Delta, where, like, it's one of the wildest. That's the and they sleep at night, they camp, and they have to keep the fire on all night so that elephants don't trample them in the thing. So, like, someone's job is to wake up every hour to keep the lion, the elephants away.

That's what I wanna do.

You just hear them in the middle of the night.

Yeah, yeah, and you could probably feel them walking around.

That's a mountain lion.

No, I just was showing you I got one.

This is the guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah,

Oh, so, he's done does a bunch of stuff like this. Yeah, I think he was on my friend Cam Haynes show.

he's cool. I wanna I, I'd love, I'd love to fucking do something with him someday. This is it like they went out to

Well, I'll bet he'll reach out. You can go do something.

please reach out and bring me to somewhere really scary and That's really all that cool.

you like to do, huh?

That's that's all I wanna do. Yeah, I don't know why, I'm just obsessed with it right now. Getting out there and seeing animals, and

well, it's very exciting.

yeah, I think I got into it through birds, I got into started into bird birding, birding, birding is the most really. fun thing.

So you're one of those guys that buys the binoculars and stares at the trees. Yeah, I'm We always make fun really, I'm, of those guys.

real, I'm really bad on it. I get it too. It's kinda a little gay.

Well, there's two groups of guys who buy high-end binoculars, and the biggest market is actually birders, the second biggest market is hunters. Yeah,

yeah. But I, I. There's a lot of s kind of similarities between, I guess, just tracking a bird to shoot it with a camera, uh, or and tracking an animal to shoot it with a a gun. There's a lot of knowledge you have to learn, the calls, the fucking, the wind directions and things like that. And I don't think that's as true with birds, but certainly, if you wanna take a photo of, like an animal, you gotta, you gotta do the same thing.

well, just It's just

seeing them in their natural habitat is very exciting, especially it's a rare bird.

the thing. With the birds are everywhere, that's why I think most people would rather be into more, uh, mammals running around, but there's none around. So, but the birds are in your fucking garden, and it's cool to look out and go, I recognize that bird, or I recognize a call.

My friend Tommy has this, uh, bird feeder, and it's hooked up to a camera that has AI. And so the AI camera takes a photo of the birds when they show up and then tells him, sends it to his phone, tells him what kind of bird it is.

I got him.

You got that?

Yeah, of course, you kidding me? What? Which ones? He got? The problem is you get too many alerts, though, cause like, it's a bing bing.

And where do you have your camera set up? I In New York City?

said, Yeah, in in New Jersey. I at at at my in-laws house, cause they live out closer to the woods. I set it up there and you. And I remember, like, I remember seeing one day, like, accidentally, a hummingbird landed on the water, cause a hummingbird shouldn't have been there. But I got it and I was able to write it on my list of all the birds that I've seen.

oh, you make a list,

Yeah, I'm a little fucking retarded, you know? But from there, that I just started wanted to take an interest in what I'm hearing. When I'm sitting around reading a book tweet, or whatever,

tweet, tweet, tweet.

what, what is that, and why is that, and what are they saying? And then once you start to do that, I started getting more into animals, and now I'm just hiking and camping and fucking.

One of the things you'll see when you go to Alaska is eagles, those are, they're like pigeons up there. It's crazy, they're everywhere.

yeah, yeah, the eagles are fucking cool. We saw some eagles in Montana when we were fishing, just big fucking guys, Wild yeah, and they could f fly around. I got these amazing videos of fucking these huge birds flying just snatching fish around.

right out of the water and flying off with them.

it's like the most enjoyable thing you can ever do is witness that.

That's so interesting that you're so into nature.

That's all I wanna do is just kinda go turn my phone off and go fucking hiking. And maybe, if I'm lucky, ever see a mountain lion somehow. I reckon if you see a mountain lion, it might be too late, but I, you I've seen know,

a few.

you've seen them in California.

Yeah, I saw one of them in California. It was in, uh, Santa Barbara, actually. We were in Montecito and we were driving down the street and I saw this thing running across the road. I said, Oh, is that a coyote? And I saw the tail, see that wavy tail, and I'm like, Oh, shit, that's a cat, and you realize, Oh my god, that's a mountain lion. We just saw a mountain lion run across the street in a really nice residential community like Monte Montecito's gorgeous, like beautiful old homes and mountain lions.

I wonder how close they get, cause I was thinking about when we were camping, like, cause there's definitely mountain lions in that region of Big Bear, but they but Generally, I, I,

they avoid people.

I. But I wonder how close, like at night, when we're sitting, like, truly, I know they avoid them. But is it by miles? Is it, you No, they know,

don't need to be miles away from you. I mean, you can't cause we catch them. They we, we know where you are, we heard they'll be long before some, we heard you know.

some noises of something growling out there. When we were watching the sunset, you could hear some animal. It could have been anything, but you just it's late at night, and then you just hear kind of a and you're like, what was that? What? What could have that been?

Yeah, they have a crazy sound that they make, mountain lions. It's really weird. So if you can find mountain lion cries, it's a very strange, mountain very strange

lion track. sound. Yeah, Yeah, I saw, I don't even foxes remember.

make a weird noise, too.

There's. There's an animal I just saw a cl- I don't, I can't remember now, but I just saw a clip of an animal where when they let off a noise at night, it's like sounds like a man in pain screaming. There's I. I just saw this like two days ago, and it's literally like, ha, and like, so it's like it, ex

That's a mountain lion. It's dark out and you hear that, you're like, Oh my god, we're gonna die and you're lost cause you're oh my god, you can't figure out how to read the map. You're going you're done, in circles you're done, your for days, your, your phone died, you're almost out of water.

you promised your wife, it's right up here, it's right here. Fuck Yeah, how would you? how could you sleep? Like, have you ever I just

been hunting?

no, I've not. While I was saying that, I'm planning my hunting trip to Ireland. My cousin, uh, he's like a YouTuber now, and he, he posts these videos. Cahal Roan, if you can give him some support. Uh, but he ho, he hunts deer,

Say that in a way that people are gonna be able to write it down.

Cahal, which is spelled C A T H A L Cahal Cottle, but the T is silent, Cahal Rowan W O, uh, R O W A N. So he's got a YouTube channel now and, uh, been watching it, but he goes out hunting, but he, he, what? He goes out in the morning and he'll have like a big tripod, and he fucking sets it up, and he fucking, and he's killing these deer. There he is.

there he is.

Yeah, you're welcome, you little prick.

He's only got seventy, 725 followers right Ah, he's now. We'll see just doing, how many he gets.

he's doing his. That'd be so funny now he, he has a million. Like tomorrow, and blow I have nothing. up, It'd be so funny, but we're gonna go hunting next year. S Uh, cause, uh, so he knows all this shit about the deer, and there he is with my uncle out there.

I didn't know there was a lot of, There's a uh, hunting

lot of deer hunting. It's in. it's not elk. I know that,

No, I don't think they have but you, you know, wolves.

Ireland had this thing called the Irish elk. It's the biggest.

biggest deer species ever. They were huge. Do you know? They found their antlers accidentally, like people pulled them up when they were fishing, no, I didn't like, hooked

know that.

them, like, like, fossilized.

And they're, ju, they're like I, I, they're bigger than you could ever enormous, bigger than imagine.

any moose. Insane. Yeah, it was a huge, huge animal.

it's an interesting, cause a lot of Irish history, we, I guess, like everyone, we just don't really know what's going on. Like, there's a certain timeline where everything is like,

That's what it looks like. That's what Irish elk's called. the Irish That's crazy. elk. Yeah, That's found in a loch.

it's like the biggest kind of deer species animal ever, is it currently?

yeah, it was enormous.

Look at that. But we had bears, too, that we had bears that we killed out before they started documenting anything. Cause they find these bear bones that have been carved up and stuff. So whatever humans were living in Ireland killed these guys off, maybe naturally from the climate change and too, or whatever, but there was Probably not definitely, it was

probably killing them.

it was, it was cult, we were co-living together at the same time, and now they're gone. We used to have wolves, I think they reintroduced wolves, we we killed them off, and then they brung brought them back.

What a good idea. Bring them back.

I guess if there's regions where it's not gonna really be too much farmland, I guess a couple of wolves are kind of, kind of cool. They're a problem. They Yeah,

breed and then they're smart, and they figure out what to do. Colorado's the they had the most retarded decision. They brought wolves and they reintroduced them right outside of Aspen, okay, so and they dropped them off. Some of them, they dropped off on my friend's ranch, and so this ranch is, uh, he doesn't run any livestock, but he's connected to other ranches that run livestock. And so these wolves are now killing all these cows and calves

that's why we killed them off, I think, in the first place, wasn't it?

100%.

But it wasn't that they were necessarily killing us, it was that they Well, they were killing were.

us, too.

The wolves were taking us, too.

Do you know the story from World War I? It's a great story.

Do not, please.

The the Germans and the Russians had a ceasefire because so many of them were getting killed by wolves, they had a ceasefire where they decided we're gonna kill the wolves, then we'll go back to killing each other.

Yeah, is that true? This is like when they played soccer at fucking New Year on Christmas Eve.

that's a different one. I think that was, wasn't that the British and That was, the Germans?

yeah, the British that they they apparently on Christmas Day, they stopped and had a little kickabout, and then they went back to shooting you imagine each other after that. that? Yeah, I don't know, you're down I think that's at these a myth, but

trenches. No, it's not a myth, it's real.

no, the soccer one, I'm saying is,

I don't think it's a myth. No, soccer one's real.

they, they stopped and had a little kick around Christmas. Why not?

and then, uh, apparently the generals and everyone got very angry at them, like, these are your enemy, go back to killing them. But I mean, like, you don't know these fucking people, they How could don't know you.

you go back to killing someone after they just fucking did it? Scored a great goal or something, did something impressive on the on? Like Well, he just you just,

shook your hand and gave you a cigarette. They were hanging out together.

did they?

They they decided to have The shirts a ceasefire and were shirts hang out together. for skins, yeah, Fuck, man,

and there's a referee and stuff, and the people

This is the New York Times associated press report of it. Uh, when I asked for, like, the AI stuff, it said it's m potential myth.

yeah, it's not, it's real. The the meat eater did a whole piece on it, where I brought up the story because someone, I forget what historian told me about the story, and I was like, is that real? And then I brought it up, and then meat eater did a whole story on it. Story is widely syndicated in contemporary newspapers. Mainstream historians and archival checks note a lack of official military orders, command logs, corroborating. Go to the meat eater story about it, cause the meat eater story was pretty, uh, well documented.

You see it above there, it was there's a link.

those guys are real.

See where it says meat eater, click on that. Okay, was there a ceasefire during World War I? Hunt wolves? So here it goes in there. Do Do there. Joe Rogan Uh, multiple New York's paper, uh, newspapers in 1917 reported the story, including the El Paso Herald, Oklahoma City Times and New York Times. Since then, it's become a favorite bit of barroom banter among amateur historians like the powerful Joe Rogan. Uh, 1917, a dispatch from Berlin noted large packs of wolves moving into populated areas of the German Empire from the forests of Lithuania and, uh, Volhynia.

Uh, locals hypothesized the war effort displaced the wolves, so the canines started seeking out new hunting grounds. Hungry wolves infiltrated rural villages, attacking calves, sheep, goats, and, in two cases, children. They also showed up at the front lines, feeding on the fallen and sometimes taking advantage of incapacitated fighters. So this is what happened.

So they would, they would have some sort of a way to send someone over with a white fucking

Yeah, so it says, as a last resort, the two adversaries, with the consent of their commanders, entered into negotiations for an armistice and joined forces to overcome the wolf plague. Wow,

did it say how many?

and this is according to a 1917 New York Times article. But all to no avail, the wolves nowhere to be found, quite so large and powerful as in Russia, were desperate in their hunger, regardless of danger. So, point a apparently, what one of the things that had happened was they'd sent guys on patrol and they wouldn't find them, they wouldn't come back, and then they would go look for them. They'd find like a foot in a boot where their leg had been severed off and eaten, and they realized, like, Oh my god, they're getting hunted by wolves.

Cause if you're a small group of people, like two guys and you go out and there's fifty wolves, like a large pack, they will eat you. I have a friend of mine who was elk hunting and he shot an elk. And they didn't realize that they shot an elk. Essentially where the wolves had their den and the wolves surrounded them and they started running in at them. And he killed, doing their thing he where they kind of, they killed three of them.

He killed two of them with a bow, and the guy he was with killed one of them with a rifle. And then they backed off, the wolves took off, they realized that something was wrong. yeah, they realized Like, they didn't they. They know how say, no bison, to. Yeah. They also realized, like, something's happening where arrows are flying at them and killing them, and they watched these guys get killed and they, they eventually took off.

they're super smart.

But he said, We were surrounded. My friend John Dudley, he talk, he talked about it on the podcast, he's got the wolf skulls in his house.

yeah, you ever s do you ever see like a video of like a bison gets singled out, surrounded by the wolves? And they just, but they just, and Grabbed he's just,

the legs.

he's, he's just spinning and spinning for five, eight hours. And they the du. I've, I've seen it. Where behind the scenes with the documentary, where, like the whole people recording it, they're like, all crying because they're literally watching an animal fight for its life for eight hours. While these packs just bite it and bite and then bite it.

Well, there's a reason why all those old nursery rhymes, like the big bad wolf, like the kids, worrying about the big bad wolf dressed up like grandma, that that was real. They you had to worry if you sent your children home through the woods, they could get eaten by wolves. That was real.

I thought it was like a metaphor for pedophiles or something.

Well, that, too, I'm sure.

Maybe I misinterpreted the art.

It's probably that's probably part of it as well. But, uh, but a real problem back then was wolves killing people.

Can I ask you a question about the bows? What's the furthest you've, uh, got an animal from when you're hunting? Like, With a bow if you can, and arrow, eighty yards, yeah, eighty yards. So you, you'll go out, you'll have your what, and this will tell you kind of a distance of something I have a range and you s, and finder, so you get.

I have a range finder and I, I lock in on the animal with the range finder. It gives you a a yardage, and then my bow is specifically c calibrated with a sight that moves up the. There's a reticle on the sight that moves up and down depending on where the distance is. So, like, say, if it's sixty yards, I dial to sixty yards, and my sight moves to a very specific position. Where my pin that's where the arrow will drop.

If I shoot straight and I don't move when during the shot, that's where the arrow will be, roughly at sixty yards.

Yeah, so, but it's always the same release. It's just the dial will tell you, go a little higher.

it's very complicated. You wanna go down a rabbit hole of like, obsession? Bow hunting is the greatest rabbit hole of obsession I could, I've ever gone down. Oh, I could, I bet you would.

I could.

Yeah, wanna see one? Um, when you do it, it is one of the most difficult things I've ever done in my life.

Do you remember the first kill you got?

It's right there.

That's you?

Yeah, that, uh, that's a a mule deer that I shot in, um, Montana with, uh, Steve Renella And how far from that show away? how far was MeatEater.

that?

That was a rifle, so that was 250 yards, I think it was. Um, but when you're doing it, um, you know, you're looking through a scope and you're shooting with a rifle. That's that's hard to do, but a bow is exponentially harder. It's way harder, it's way harder. Yeah, you're close. Like the eighty-yard shot that I had, the only reason why I would have ever taken that shot, that's that's an elk that I shot.

That was fifty,

And you don't have any

fifty-four yards.

support on that thing, you're holding it with I'm holding your because my cousin, he, he brings out like a kind of a big tripod that, that's that gets the shot for the gun.

that's different.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, but you don't do So that with the bow.

no, but I would do that with a rifle. It makes the rifle more accurate. It's smart, especially It's got if you're shooting it at a distance.

he has a silencer on, too,

You don't wanna.

which weighs a ton. Yeah, well, Yeah,

there's silencers on that. It's they're not well, maybe that

he's a little bit of a bitch about it, but he's

it's not that heavy. I mean, it's, uh, and it's not really a silencer, it's a suppressor, so it really just takes some of the sound out. You can still hear it.

is that so? If you miss, you don't scare everything off, or even if you do, really,

so it doesn't blow your eardrums out. Cause if you have a like, if you have a rifle, like one of my rifles is, um, it's, uh, it's is a. It's got what's called a muzzle break, and a muzzle break is at the front of the rifle. There's holes in the barrel that allow the gases to disperse. So what that does is it lessens the recoil, so there's less of a kick when the gun goes off. So, a very powerful hunting rifle, like if you're shooting a moose or something like that, you got a powerful rifle.

Like, kind, you wanna if you wanna kill Charlie Kirk, you got a powerful rifle. And on the impact, there's a lot of movement, right? And if you flinch, and if you're worried about that recoil, you're you'll be less accurate. So there's a thing called a muzzle break. The problem with a muzzle break is it makes the rifle shot way louder. And, uh, I have two friends that have lost hearing because they were close to a a a rifle when it went off with the mi- muzzle break on it, and they blew their eardrums out.

Buddy of mine, um, he's, he has oh, Jesus, fucking hearing aids. Yeah, really. but the point is that, like a a tripod or a shooting sticks, they sit down allows you to have a much better. Like most guys when they're shooting at real distance, so there's things, so there's like, say, like, fifty yards to a hundred yards. A lot of guys are comfortable shooting offhand. That means just holding the rifle, wrapping the rifle sling around your arm, so you're, you know, tight, pushing it to your chest and then making sure you're not moving, and boom, and you could.

Up to like a hundred yards, you could probably get away with that, but if it's anything more than that, you really wanna be stabilized, so you wanna be on a tripod or shooting sticks. When it's further than like, 300 yards, most guys wanna be prone, so they wanna be laying down. So what they'll do is they'll lay their pack down and they rest the rifle on their pack, and they want their whole body to be rested on the ground, so there's no movement.

And so they're looking through that, and all they're moving is their finger, so everything is stable and all they're doing is slowly squeezing, so the rifle's resting on that pack. So there's no nothing that could possibly move it. yeah, it seems So with a bow, you don't have any seems like of that.

a lot of like fun, or at least a very exciting

It's very exciting.

thing, especially if you can. I don't know if you, if you're, especially if it's like a thing that's needed for the ecosystem to continue, the ecology of a thing.

It certainly is kind of, Well, that's the excuse but we're gonna use the

so I can kill an animal and not pretend I'm helping.

well, the thing is, if you don't kill them, they're gonna get killed. There the no. No animals live forever and become angels. What happens is they get killed by wolves, and usually they get killed in a harbor.

But in Ireland, we don't have the fucking wolves, Or so none of they freeze to there's.

death, or they starve to death. They ru- they run their teeth down and they can't process food anymore, and you see them and they're they're scrawny and all fucked up. And then, um, something gets them, you know, it's usually winter. More of more animals die from winter than anything, especially in like the mountains. They're they, they'll have strong winter die-offs, where, like in Utah, where I was at two years ago, they lost something like 70% of their population of mule deer from the winter winter die-off.

70% of em s froze to death.

So then the following year, they've got less tags to go out. Yeah, yeah.

And so in those kind of situations, you know, you don't really need humans to take care of the population. The idea is that humans manage the population in a couple of ways. One, um, you do keep the population in check. If it's an area where there's not a lot of predators, then it's kind of important that humans do it because otherwise they can get disease and there's too many of them. Starvation, overpopulation. But the other thing is that the money that goes into, um, tags and also sporting goods equipment.

So when you're buying a tent, if you're buying, um, a rifle, if you're buying a bow, a certain percentage of that money goes into wildlife conservation. So, like So that fund,

r e I or one of these kind of places, they they have to, kinda

yeah, it's part of the Law. I think it's called, uh, something Pittman-Pittman-Roberts Act, and look that up. So what that is, I think it's, I forget what the percentage is, but that percentage here, uh, Pittman Robertson Wildlife Restoration Act, uh, that was in 1937. U. S. federal law places an excise tax on the sale of firearms, ammunition and archery equipment to fund state-level wildlife conservation, habitat restoration and hunter safety programs. So it's 11% federal excise tax on sporting firearms, ammunition and archery equipment, and 10% tax on handguns, and all that goes to conservation.

So that pays for game wardens, it pays for wildlife biologists, it pays to make sure that the populations are healthy. They do studies on them, And things like collaring wolves and, you know, finding out what their migration patterns are, following deer migration patterns. It's also that we keep the populations healthy. It's like the number one con contributor in this country to wildlife conservation is hunters.

Yeah, so, they, yeah, I

Yeah, because they, th- if you th- the people that don't hunt and don't eat meat or think it's cruel, they would think that there's no way someone who hunts loves animals. There's no way you Could.

Once you understand the role of it all, I think it makes it. And also, I think a lot of hunters who are outside, they're more in tune. I think they're more environmentalist probably than most people who never leave, Unquestionably. because they have an understanding of Leave No Trace, things like Unquestionably. that, the importance of it. To And keep keep keeping these hunting places that they hunt, keeping them wild, keeping them like that.

keeping them pure. And that's like, uh, the one of the most disappointing things when you go hunting and you find, like, a water bottle or a beer can, you s you find like a bunch of beer cans Like, I use like, someone condoms. least, they're being responsible. But you find, Yeah, I guess like, places not many people are where

wrapping up in the middle of the woods, are they?

when you when you go out to these places, you know, you you want them to be look, footprints are one thing, that should be it. Footprints, maybe like a fire pit that you put out, but that should be it. You shouldn't be leaving your shit behind.

So, it makes a lot of money every year, but I just noticed this at the end.

Okay, so it says, uh, regular generates between $800,000,001.2 billion annually, non-hunter contribution, even though it was originally pushed by sportsmen. Data now shows that roughly seventy-three to 74% of the revenue actually generated by non-hunters purchasing firearms and ammunition for recreational shooting, home defense or collecting. That's just cause because it's 10% goes to, uh, handguns, and 11% with rifles. Um, it's just cause more people have those than go hunting.

But that's also no one's, like, fighting against that. It's a good it's a good use of tax money. It's, uh, it's very important because if you don't have that, then you just have these wild open lands, and you don't have people patrolling them to make sure people aren't poaching, cause that's a real problem. Poaching is a giant problem. It's a giant problem in this country where people go onto land that's not theirs, they they go onto private land or public land where they don't have a tag and they hunt, and, you know,

They're like, America's so big. It's, like, fucking impossible. But you're the lands that you have here are probably the best thing about this country, the national parks, the the systems

It's pretty sick.

that you have, like, I I I never learned about it until I moved here. Like, that wasn't something you you thought about, and you think of America, like, it's all kind of just fast food and fatties in their car. That's kind of it, just some fat dipshit from fucking Tennessee eating Wendy's. And then you get here, and then you hear about these national parks, you're like, what? And then you go to them, and you're like, What the fuck?

I know, it's nuts.

Like, I remember first time going to Zion was just fucking Zion's crazy, crazy. All crazy. of Utah is nuts. Utah, I like, I could

Utah's gorgeous.

move there pretty soon, become a Mormon, have six, sixteen wives. Yeah,

Let's go.

why not? That's the American dream I want.

Yeah, Utah's fucking beautiful.

Utah is beautiful.

Yeah, the mountains of Utah is one of my favorite places to go. That's the one place that I saw a real mountain lion. I I was with my friend Colton a few years back, and we were driving. He's a a hunting guide that I go with every year, and we were driving back. Um, so, what we do is you drive into the mountains, you park, and then you're walking eight, ten miles a day. You're going through the mountain.

You have to be in serious shape. Like, I get in shape, like, I work out specifically for these trips.

Cause how much what's the weight on the back?

It's not the back, it's just the the real the G- carrying them out is a motherfucker, dude, cause then you're you've got, like, uh, we carried that elk out, and I got a bunch of guys to help me. We didn't even have to go very far. We only went a few hundred yards, but it was like this, like, like an insane angle with loose dirt, and I had a quarter Jesus. on my back, a rear hindquarter, which is like a hundred pounds, and you're going straight uphill, and it Are you is

like tying that onto a thing? You're dragging you tie it onto it like a sled a pack. I type of thing? have a pack, Okay, yeah.

and my pack is specifically got, uh, I have it's called exo mount You must gear.

when that's all done, cause it's the same feeling as when you go to the gym and you're finished and you feel fucking great or whatever. When you've done hunting, got the deer back, you must feel like that's good.

It's amazing.

And then your phone goes, Plee, plee. Did you hear about this? And you go, No, I don't wanna know about No, there's it. I'm killing fucking

luckily, there's no service. deer. But when you're when you're doing that and you eat it, it your connection to that food is so different. Like, I made an elk steak, uh, or an elk roast, rather, yesterday, and, uh, I was eating it, and, uh, and I was eating, it, I was like, I was

You got. there. Like, I remember That's motherfucker.

when this happened. I remember the arrow flying. I remember the sound when it hit the rib cage. I remember quartering it up and carrying it out. I member, I remember all the work, I remember all the hours I practiced shooting my bow. Wow. Well, you. Most It's like you people, people have to practice get that kinda feel every day.

like a little bit of that feeling from fucking growing like herbs in their yard in their yard, and then you feel great when you put a little parsley on something.

100%.

So, if you were to really learn how to bow and track it and learn to fucking how to follow them, where to find them, I think it could. It's probably rewarding, more rewarding than It's going to fucking Burger King. This is the problem is people think, and I love animals, and I think I'm an environmentalist and, but, like, they I think people associate hunting with this kind of an anti-environment thing, whereas the guy eating a Burger King is probably just as like.

That's maybe arguably, you could say that's like less ethical, the way we, like, farm cows versus actually catching a fucking Well, especially industrial that, yeah, agriculture when they when yeah.

they when do in industrial farming of animals is wild. It that should be illegal. They should have never allowed that to happen in the first place when they have these giant warehouses stuffed And now with pigs.

we're relying on it so you can't you can't get, you right? Now cities know? Yeah.

need it.

I could be I could be probably persuaded. I could have somewhere in there, with the right argument, I could probably be persuaded to kinda, like, get away from, like, unethically

Source food.

mass-produced food. Yeah. I could I could

of course.

I could be convinced to go, like, vegan, I guess, but probably not, but

It's not that good for you. It's very difficult to do it right to to be vegan and to get all the, ah, essentially amino acids and B12, and you have to supplement with a lot of things. It's very difficult But it's to just eat great to tell you vegetables.

get to tell everyone. But Yes, you you do get to tell get to tell everyone everyone. to go, Sorry, make you get to make Christmas difficult for your fucking.

A lot of animals die in making food, especially m monocrop agriculture. You have to kill millions and millions of birds and rodents and rabbits and groundhogs, they all have to die. They all have to die. And if you have a a large monocrop farm, you're killing a fuckload of animals every year. And forget about the bugs, the amount of bugs you murder, you have to murder so many bugs in order to have a farm.

What, are you spr- spraying shit? Spraying I'm talking about like driving.

pesticides, uh, they get run over by stuff, combines chew up animals that are there. It's, uh, there's a lot of death involved in in acquiring food. It's just the difference between the death environ- uh, involved in acquiring food, the f- the feeling that you get from just going to a grocery store and picking up some vegetables. You don't think about it, you think, oh, vegetables, no big deal, I'll get some vegetables. A lot of death involved in growing those vegetables.

No fucking question about it. Unless you're going to a regenerative organic farm and buying all your vegetables from there. But I think the best way is to grow your own in a garden. The feeling that you get, like, we're talking about, like, parsley and herbs and stuff like that. The feeling that you get when you make a salad from your own garden is fucking amazing. Amazing. It's amazing. You're slicing up your own peppers. Yeah, Tomatoes, all that stuff, putting it in a salad, putting the olive oil and vinegar on it, you're eating it, like, I fucking grew this.

I And then you make grew this.

it, and you also you share that with your family, which is the probably the purest thing in life is to eat with your family might be nothing better than that. Kill And then killing on stage and then feeding your family tomatoes that you grew in your yard. Well, I Are the two think great goals in life.

we get to experience a thing that most people will never experience, and that is the the feeling that you get from a crowd of people having a great time laughing. That is, I can't imagine a life without that. Cause it's such a high. It's such I. I was. I've had so many conversations with my friends, like, imagine going through life and never killing. Not once. Never once. Uh, but never once. Where you get a standing ovation, That's everybody's laughing.

Thank you very much, good night. That feeling is we're so lucky. We're so fucking lucky to have that feeling. And the fact to have it all the time. And I you can have it mean, even tonight. yeah, hopefully. Well, Yeah, come here's the thing, on, brother.

even even great comics can bomb, right? And then even bad comics can kill. It's sort of just the dude.

Not. Really. I, yeah, I yeah, Very rarely.

do. Le- less likely than a great comic, uh, bomb, for sure.

but especially when you release a special, then you're unarmed, and then you have to go on stage with new material. You don't know what the fuck you're talking about, you're just trying. And the beginning few sets, they're

Yeah, I'm going through some painful. growing, so I got this, like, new bit without giving away about a about a a caveman and his wife having a fight. And it crushes so hard for the first little bit, and then I kinda get into some deep waters where I don't know where the fight's going. And I'm sometimes it works out where they, you know, make sense, and then sometimes it just, uh, But one I don't know. day, it'll work, Hopefully.

it'll take forever. I Yeah,

mean, that's what it is, man. It's like this this long journey of trying to figure out what a bit really is. And then there's a real problem with getting trapped in the original structure of it. Like, sometimes I get accustomed to saying something a certain

100%.

way, and then I'm like, Boy, this is dull. There's something about this I don't like. I need to abandon it and redo it from the beginning. I know there's something in the premise, but it's not there.

you get repetitive and, like, I start off, uh, that's my biggest problem is I start off loose, and then you say it so many times, so many nights that suddenly you decide to go, now I'm reciting a script, and I'm not talking to these people at all. So sometimes I'll intentionally say something different, even if it makes the joke a little worse, it elevates the experience, cause they know I'm fucking in the room. But that's how I tried.

All my favorite people, Patrice and Burr and all these guys, they are like that, where not every set is the same. Yes, you're fucking When my around with it. Yeah, Yeah, yeah, and it keeps it yeah,

fresh in your mind, it's still we're we're we're blessed real.

with some of the Patrice O'Neal stuff, because he has the same jokes in multiple different places, but they're it's a different kinda thing each time. It's a different vibe, it's a different way of Yeah, well, speaking. Yeah,

he was very improvisational, very loose, and also wise, like he, he, he would do these points, he would, eh, make these points. He'd be like, Oh, yeah, always. There was so and he would, much of his and he would say material.

it to you in a dumb way. It might be real stupid, like that bit about him enjoying, uh, watching, uh, baseball, and then his wife comes over and his girlfriend comes over and sits beside him, and go, What you doing? He goes, We're watching baseball. Put the why the blind shut? They're like, let me put open the blinds, get the light in here. He's like, What are you eating? You're eating a burger? You don't want a burger, it's eleven AM.

I'm gonna make you a sandwich, a dry turkey sandwich. And she's like, Hug me, kiss me, kiss me, mean it, mean the kiss. Um, yeah, you got the best bit. He's got the best. He was awesome. Yeah, I wish I s I wish I. I wish he was around when, uh, for just this to have seen him once, you know, before he was dead. He was dead by the time I got here.

Well, he would be the biggest podcaster on earth.

You think so? Yeah, he'd be right Bage, Philip.

up there. He'd be like me and him would be right there together. He might be

Black Philip.

number one, I might be number two. That might be good for me. Yeah, your rival, Take a

the future.

little. No, just take a little weight off me. Yeah,

yeah, yeah. Well, you don't know, maybe he's a fucking wacky old fucking retard, too, because a lot of people that that happens, you don't Yeah, he you don't know.

would. No No, he was too smart. He wouldn't not been wacky. He would have great takes on things. He was just always he was fantastic on Opie and Anthony. I mean, that's where I hung out with him the most, like, doing Opie and Anthony with him.

yeah, he, he was the best. Crusher, just he just Yeah,

it was so funny, and like, finding things that you do that are stupid and like rubbing them in your face and you have to, like, like, No, no, it's so true. Yeah, he would have been awesome on podcasts, cause, what, he was, like, designed for that. Let's, what, cause Opie and Anthony was really the first podcast. It was really it was a radio show, sure, but credit to them, the way they ran it, they let the comedians run it.

It was, you know, Voss and Jimmy Norton and Burr and Ari and all of us, we'd be in there, and it would just be like a wild podcast. They they let everybody just go nuts. They didn't have a structure. Like, if you do Howard Stern, you have a structure. Howard Stern's not gonna let me come on with three of my friends and and just talk shit and smoke weed and and get crazy. With with Howard Stern, you go on, so so, let me tell you, hey, let me ask you about Fear Factor.

Did you do that? Did you like that show? Did you and this just do it for money? He would ask. He would. It was an interview.

and that was emailed to you beforehand. These are the questions we're going to no, no. Howard ask. No,

didn't do it that way. But but when you would do Opie and Anthony, you would do it, it was a hang. He would just go in and everybody would hang out, and there was always content. And it made me realize, like, oh, you don't have to have a structure. Like this conversation, you and I met last night for the first time. We hung out in the green room, had a grand old time, and then we came here today.

We didn't talk about what we were gonna talk about. we actually We didn't.

didn't talk about a single thing we talked about last night. I was coming in here today going, I think I'm gonna talk about arc of the trio, Arc of or whatever, the Covenant, not the, uh, the Ark of Covenant, Ark of Covenant The Ethiopians, being guarded by some fucking Ethiopians. I was like, that we're definitely talking about that. Didn't even come close to it. Yeah,

But that's the thing about a podcast, and that was the thing about Opie and Anthony. It was a wide open, and I think that was the birth of podcasts. I think that show, in particular, because of the way they ran it, particularly because of Anthony. Like, Anthony Kumiya is a very, uh, he's got a lot of interesting information and knowledge in his head, and he always will pull these things out, like, he historical references to things, like, eh, so the way this started, and he would explain something, and you're like, Whoa, that's crazy.

Like, he knows a lot of things, and it, like, contributed to the depth of the conversation, and then everybody'd be talking shit about it, but they just let it play out.

yeah. If you listen to on Spotify somewhere, someone's really put all of the Patrice O'Neal. It's like a whole, like, album of just Patrice O'Neal and O. And A. And, like, sometimes I'll I'd put that on, you know, when I used to drive trucks, I'd put that on, and it was just there was something about it cause it was so it was s very slow, almost like, as in, no one was in an a any hurry.

Sometimes with podcasts now, we're all, like, trying to zing-zing, whatever. They had this kind of a calm thing. Where we're going, we're here for four fucking hours, so let's take our time, let's relax.

And they're doing it every day.

And they would talk about one subject for a long time. They would s stick on it for an hour and a half, it was a kinda thing, they

great show.

they would, yeah.

I remember before I did it, I would listen to it all the time. I'm like, these guys are having fun.

Kumi is doing something with Jim now. They have a pod.

fantastic. They were just, uh, guests on Kill Tony. So the episode's out this week.

Kilt. I didn't re so I did Kill Tony a couple of weeks ago. I was in town, and they just let me go up and do a spot, you know, I didn't have to do a book it or anything like that. But, uh, I got more feedback on that show than, like, pretty much anything It's I've ever done. Like, I had, like, huge. yeah, I had, like, cousins

It's huge.

I haven't talked to in years reach out to me and things like that going, Hey, I saw your fucking Kill Tony, and I was like, Yeah, I'm doing stuff all the time, actually, but yeah, thanks, you for, and this, yeah, it's a massive.

Yeah, I went to the Monday night well, I meant went to meet Jeremy Clarkson, cause he came to watch the Monday He was just hanging Night. So Tony

out and awesome. just hanging out, hanging Dude.

out in the green room. He's the best. He's so fun. But Jimmy introduced me to him, Jimmy Carr, so he was a guest on the panel.

you know, I heckled Jimmy Carr in a theater before I ever did stand up, years ago. Fucking years ago. I I don't know what got into, you know, he and so no, he was doing a Q and A at the end of it, and this is a big theater in Ireland, and he was like, anyone have any questions? And I said, Can I get a photo with you after the show? And then he started making fun of my accent going, I get a photo with you.

He goes, Oh, me, stolen camera or whatever. And then I said, Uh, your fat head might not fit in the photo. And then the whole crowd goes, Ooh, and then he went, he did a little let me just open this can of whoop ass. And I don't even I don't even remember what he said to me, but he just unleashed all of the and people are grabbing me going, Ah, you're a stranger. You fucking idiot, you dipshit.

Did were you thinking about doing comedy before that?

I think I might have been. Yeah, I definitely Right, like s and I

in the backyard.

definitely started at one point. I met him again years later at another show, and I told him the story, but I definitely I s I wanted, you know, I wanted to do comedy when I was, like, sixteen, cause I saw it on TV. I go, This is the coolest thing ever. But I'd only ever seen, like, specials. That's all I knew was specials. So I was like, I I gotta write an hour, and then I'll go do an a special.

That's what I I I was sixteen, I didn't have any idea. So I remember sitting down, going, All right, I'll write it, I'll write a little every night, and then after a couple of weeks, I'll have an hour, and then I'll just go be on TV like these guys. I was like, That's genuinely, I had no understanding of what was the in between there.

That's hilarious.

And yeah, so I remember writing a story one night, and then the next night, I I sat down to write again, I reread the previous night. I was like, That's not funny at all. And I just said, All right, I can't do that. And then it wasn't until, like, fucking, uh, you know, six years later, I saw a thing on TV about open mics. I was like, Oh, I didn't even realize there's like a whole thing in between.

Process, Yeah, process, yeah, and then that was, like, years ago.

Well, listen, brother, you're very funny.

Thank you.

really funny. I'm I'm enjoying watching your shit. I'm looking Great. forward to watching you tonight live. That's yeah, the Caveman, cool. You'll do we'll see have some if it goes or fun. Let's go. not. This is And the

the new special.

special Bells and Whistles available right now on YouTube. Where'd you film it?

New York Comedy Club. Yeah, Nice, beautiful, so yeah, there we go. beautiful. All right, Yeah, thank you so much, beautiful. Thank Joe. Appreciate

you, brother.

it. Thank you.

Let's do this again sometime.

I loved it.

All right, bye, brother.